The Three Rs is a primarily British viral entertainment site, with standings in many niche interests and involved in a variety of different groups. Topics range from gaming to adulthood to the latest fashion.
Dee4leeds Intro: Yes, it's still November but Digital Spy have made a great post reviewing the gaming options this Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanzaa/Pumpkin Pie Day. I thought you guys would like to read it.
Xbox 360 Price: £129.99 upwards. Online: Yearly subscription at a cost of £39.99; isn't wireless out of the box. Why buy it: The 360 is often touted as the console of choice for the hardcore gamer. The online aspect can be expensive, but it has a wide user base and has the expertise of Microsoft behind it. The 360 is now the cheapest piece of hardware on the market and so it won't break the bank. However, the console itself can be unreliable and has a history of breaking down.
Exclusive Titles Gears Of War 2: The jewel in Microsoft's crown, Gears Of War 2 has received universal praise for taking the winning formula of blood, guts, guns and gore and making it even better. It's possibly the best looking game of all time and provides hours of vicious, violent, joy - both on and offline. Fable 2: Never before has a game offered so much in terms of lifestyle choices. Fable 2 puts the player in charge of their destiny and while game-changing decisions are few and far between, the ability to subtly influence your surroundings makes Fable 2 an essential 360 title. Lips: The Xbox 360 version of Singstar is an enjoyable party game, featuring 40-odd songs and a decent microphone peripheral. Two microphones equals even more fun, and belting out the duets provides essential entertainment around a traditional log fire.
Best Of The Rest Call Of Duty: World At War (Also available on the PS3 and PC.) Rock Band 2
Playstation 3 Price: Most outlets sell a PS3 with a game for under £300, but it pays to shop around. Online: Wireless out of the box, with a download network that sports some impressive titles at a reasonable price. Why buy it: Although a bit more expensive than its competitors, the PS3 is technically the most powerful console on the market and has a built-in Blu-ray DVD drive.
Exclusive Titles Resistance 2: The first title was decent without ever being essential. Resistance 2 on the other hand is commanding rave reviews and looks like being a serious contender to Microsoft's Gears Of War in the exclusive shooter category. With quality online modes and impressive level design, Resistance 2 should be near the top of anyone's Christmas wish list. LittleBigPlanet: If ever there was a title that could put a smile on a gamer's face it's this one. With simple and addictive gameplay, multiplayer that's both team-based and competitive, plus the ability to create your own levels and share them online, LittleBigPlanet has it all and is one of the purest gaming titles of the year. Motorstorm: Pacific Rift: Much like Resistance, Motorstorm launched with the PS3 and impressed gamers without really blowing them away. Pacific Rift adds a great deal to the original title. For a start it has double the number of courses and much more variety to boot. Pacific Rift can be a tactical affair that rewards experimentation. The only downside is that it's so fast and furious that you won't be able to fully appreciate the rich and vibrant scenery.
Best Of The Rest Pro Evolution Soccer 2009: (Also available on the PS2, PSP, PC and 360.) Dead Space: (Also available on the 360 and PC.)
Nintendo Wii Price: Retails at £179.99, many stores now offer a free game in addition to Wii Sports. Online: Wireless out of the box, with a great online store that sells classic retro games. A friend code is needed to play online, which slightly restricts the experience. Why buy it: Extremely user-friendly and innovative. Anybody can play the Wii and it has attracted a user-base far beyond the core gamer demographic. 2008 hasn't done much to appease the hardcore gamer, with criticisms that there are too many party, family and non-games, although this makes it ideal for youngsters.
Exclusive Titles Wii Fit: OK, so it came out in April, but Wii Fit will no doubt be the most sought after title this Christmas. It's not a game in the traditional sense, but it comes bundled with a balance board that will inevitably become part of Nintendo's gaming repertoire. It has been in short supply since it came out, so tracking it via websites such as Wiipreorder.co.uk might be the best way to guarantee a copy. Wii Music: Not a title that will appease hardcore gamers, but can be enjoyable provided you have enough people playing. The fun you have playing Wii Music may eventually prove short lived, but memories of spending Christmas waving your arms around like lunatics will be priceless. Warioland: The Shake Dimension: Despite being largely overlooked, Warioland: The Shake Dimension is a classic Nintendo game brought bang up to date. The beautiful hand-drawn visuals and the addictive gameplay is a perfect example of Nintendo doing what they do best. Its only real flaw is that it's over too quickly. Wario's latest offering is definitely one to look out for if you want some old-school fun.
Best Of The Rest Guitar Hero: World Tour: (Also available on the PS3, PS2 and 360.) Shaun White Snowboarding: (Also available on the 360, PS3, PS2, DS, PSP and PC.)
The Post continues with PC, DS and PSP options here.
We had the pleasure of attending the Thought Bubble Festival as press, which is great news for us! And seeing as we are ever growing imagine what we could be saying next month!
Poll Results
On the Long Distance Forums you were asked "PC or Mac?" You have decided that... PC is the best system.
Comments include: "Have spent some time using a Mac and was really not impressed at all. It could be because i am just so used to using a PC but i gave it a fair chance and didnt take well to it at all." by Maverick.
Poll of the Month will be posted tomorrow like the usual, you'll be able to vote and discuss the topic until the end of the month back on Res3.net. Well be at Leeds Next Top Model next month along with the possible launch of a new website... R3cord? Maybe... maybe not!
Hello to everyone. I'd like to present myself. The name's Unleashed...Unleashed11! This is my first post here and I'd like to start with a rant. This particular rant is about old people.
Nowadays, everyone thinks of teenagers as delinquents. We are loud, we are stupid and we don't have the slightest respect for grown ups. Who cares? It's not our fault some dumbasses ruined our reputation! But old people? They don't even think before saying: " Ah! When I was your age, we'd get our asses kicked if we said Fuck!" Who cares you ancient relic? You've just said it yourself! Does that mean I've got to kick your ass?
They are always bitching. "I want this! Give it to me!!", "Don't do that!", " Mary-Jane go get my slippers." ; followed by a quick: " Fuck you" by Mary-Jane.
One of the worse things about them, is that they are all ( when I say all, I mean 90% of them) deaf!
- "Grandpa I'm going out!"
- "Why is the dog out?"
- "I said I'M GOING OUT."
- "I heard you! No need to scream! I'm not deaf!! But be sure to take the dog back in ok?"
- " -_- "
And don't you hate when they bitch about money?
- "You spend way too much money on videogames! If I was your age, I'd keep all the money and go buy some cookies! ... Ah, the good old days."
Furthermore, they all like agriculture. They pass hours and hours on their bloody garden, throwing some bloody seeds around, hoping that something will grow. And when something does grow, it seems like it's Christmas.
- "Hell Yeah! John look! Grandpa did it! Tonight we're having cabbage for dinner!"
- "Sorry Grandpa. I'm going to McDonalds with Jenny."
- "McDonalds? You eat too much of that rat food. Tonight you'll eat some of Grandpa's delicious cabbage!!"
And how can we forget about... Bingo. Old people sure like to play their Bingo. It's like if everyone has a Bingo sense in their brain, that switches itself on when you get to the young age of 60.
- "69!"
And then some ancient being in the back, gets up and shouts: "BINGOOOO". And everyone looks at him with razor sharp eyes, cursing him as much as they can.
Another thing everyone hates about old people is that, when they are talking to you on the couch, they ALWAYS go to sleep before the conversation has ended.
- " And then.....ZZZZZZ"
- " And then what Grandpa? Damn!! Don't go to sleep now!!"
Well I guess that's pretty much everything. So please, let's all work hard, not to be like the old generation, and make a change! Vote for George W. Bu- I meant vote for Obama :D
Arthur Miller's Death of a Salesman, considered a classic of American theatre, is one play that certainly delivers what its title suggests. The play is based on the advancement throughout the play of Willy Loman's mental perplexity in his resolute determination to achieve success, which ultimately leads to his death. It has been and by some still is, seen as an attack on the American consumer society, a form of capitalism, and its disastrous consequences for many like Willy Loman. Miller shows the extreme and undoubtedly harsh result of the pursuit of the American Dream that ends in death for his main character Willy Loman. The play is seen by some to be an assessment of the American culture of the time, the success for some and the sadness for others.
The staging of this play, 59 years after it was first premiered in New York, was an efficient, well-organised production that utilised props and the use of the stage superbly. The use of two movable sets to convey several different scenes was seamless and surprisingly accurate in displaying the various locations used in the play. Not a production for the fans of laugh out loud comedy, this play did however manage to raise a chortle or two amongst the audience in what was a rather solemn play.
Overall the play was far from being curse-like and was an entertaining evening with proficient acting by all involved. It still seems that 59 years on the play still has the ability to captivate an audience and put across Miller's message. That is, if he did have one at all.
Hey everyone! Before I start off with my post, I would like to wish a fantastic and happy ThanksGiving to everyone!
After spending a lot of my time watching movies - especially during the holidays, something set me thinking about animation movies.
If we take a look at the recent releases, there is no major movie based on 2D animation. Is 2D animation worn out, or just not commercial enough? Even if those classic animations are always a pleasure to watch, you have to admit that the modern animation is more attractive.
They are more real, and people seem to love that. If we take a look at the box office, we see 2 animation movies in top 10 (Shrek 2 and Finding Nemo) with 1,7 billion dollars revenue.
That is very amazing. And for both movies CGI (Computer-Generated Imagery) was used. So, why do studios use CGI, and why do we like it so much?
I tend to say, that from the film fan’s point of view, it’s the story that makes the movie so attractive, because, anytime I would like to see a movie like Shrek, with real actors, scenes, and other real stuff. But it’s the story that does all the trick. From the creators’ point of view, it is cheaper. Because, with today’s special effects, anything is possible with real actors, and they can’t deny that.
But, like I said, it’s cheaper than physical methods, such as constructing elaborate miniatures for effects shots or hiring a great deal of extras for crowd scenes, and because it allows the creation of images that would not be feasible using any other method.
It can also allow a single artist to produce content without the use of actors or other contributors to the project. The first studio to release a fully computer-generated feature film was Pixar, with their Toy Story.
The movie was a major box office hit, generating $360,000,000. Pixar is also “responsible” with other successful animation movies, such as Finding Nemo, A Bug’s Life or The Incredibles.
The other real competitor for Pixar is DreamWorks SKG, with Shrek, Shrek 2(this is the animation that generated the largest income for an animation movie, over 880 million dollars), Antz or Chicken Run.
Now that I mentioned Chicken Run, this is a very interesting animation, because it’s not like the other.
For this movie Claymation was used. What exactly is Claymation? Well, in clay animation, each object is sculpted in clay or a similarly pliable material such as plasticine, usually around an armature.
As in other forms of object animation, the object is arranged on the set, a shot is taken and the object or character is then moved very slightly by hand. Another shot is taken and the object moved slightly again. To achieve the best results, a consistent shooting environment is needed to maintain the illusion of continuity. This means paying special attention to maintaining consistent lighting and object placement. Even if Chicken Run was not a huge hit, DreamWorks used Claymation again, for the remake of Wallace and Gromit.
So, no matter what techniques the creators use, it seems that the 2D animation days are gone and computer-animated movies become more real with every release, breaking revenue records.
So what do you think? Do you think that the future of the cinema is simply 3D animations? Or do you think that there is still a possibility of 2D animation existing popularly?
...The Number of the Post Count! Rants and Reviews was spawned to be released!
Thank God I didn't the chance to make this post! And also I would like to thank everyone who has helped in our on going attempt to dethrone Google from it's number 1 slot! We'll do it someday!
I know its early and - as Reload said - people are still reeling from Thanksgiving in the US. However, this song is epic and therefore should be plugged the Hell and back. Presenting, The Hives versus a (very naughty!) Cyndia Lauper.
For all us North Americans, its Thanksgiving today! From here on out until New Years its officially "holiday season". So Prepare to see more posts from me about the best buys of the holidays. Especially since tomorrow is Black Friday, the beginning of the traditional Christmas shopping season.
Before I go I'd thought give you a heads up on the Food Network's page about different recipes and the like. See you next time, I'm gonna go eat!
Velica. 23 years in the making, as Kenneth Johnson, writer and artist, proudly proclaims. But just how well spent were those 23 years? Certainly, on first inspection, it looks impressive. As Melaisis and Dee4leeds, our Thought Bubble reporters, mentioned previously - it's amazing how high quality some independent works of art can be. But unfortunately, certain fundamental flaws have limited its great potential.
The story, or the concept behind it all, is nothing new. In fact, it's been recycled so many times, it's nothing but a moist ball of papermache. Papermache which Velica tediously attempts to flatten out back into the basis for yet another artistic work. The 'bad guys' are, in as generic a way as can be imagined, portrayed as nameless, faceless owners of large corporations. This all unfolds within the first two pages, instantly leaving Velica some way to climb in order to reach my good books again. I don't see what was wrong with traditional villains, back before every CEO in the world seemingly became hell-bent on destroying the planet and enslaving the population. Some of my favourite antagonists of all time were little more than weirdos. Look at some classic Batman baddies - The Joker, Two Face, The Penguin, The Riddler, and co. None of them had to own the world's biggest chain of shoe retailers to be evil. In fact, if they did, they'd probably be less evil. The Joker was a clever but sadistic anarchist dressed more or less like a clown (after his initial child-minded insanity days), Two Face had half his face burnt off, The Penguin was short, fat and generally bizarre, whilst the Riddler was akin to the crazy man who sits a few seats away from you on an otherwise empty bus talking to himself in a language you're sure doesn't exist.
I regret to say that is not my only grievance. The standard of dialogue falls away in places (how many people, after having their hand impaled by a flying pencil, proclaim "Aaah, man, someone just threw a pencil at me"?) More crucially, why do all heroes and heroines in this day and age need futuristic gadgets and fast cars (always conveniently located) in order to beat the bad guys? I suppose in order to compete with traditional heroes with super-powers, they need something to make them appear convincing. But still, why not be creative for once? Who does every moral crusader have a sleek, black, incredibly fast car, that can dodge through traffic with ease, and - quite remarkably - never crashes? It's a pet peeve of mine. I love classic comic books, but it seems that over time, originality found itself phased out. You no longer need to be clever, fresh or innovative to be a hero or heroine. You just need to be a clone of the character that preceded you. Velica doesn't try all that hard to break away from this. Whether it's a lack of artistic flair or a cynical "why try anyway" attitude that's responsible, I can't help but feel disappointed that Velica didn't try to do better by itself. Overall, it's well drawn, and obviously has flair to it. With a spot of original thinking, it could have been far better than it is.
The overall standard of drawing is high (even though minor printing errors - such as words running off the page - prove irritating), and a lot of credit is due to Mr Johnson for standing his ground for so many years. But ultimately, what lets Velica down is 'clone syndrome'. The lead character is a sexy female who wears skimpy, leather clothes, saves the day with her athletic fighting skills, and drives around in the sort of car that you can't even dream of having. She is every other comic book hero and heroine from the last few decades, and, ultimately, that is why the comic book/graphic novel scene is in purgatory right now. If only it had dared to be unique, it could have been much different for this frankly average publication.
Mel and Dee were most certainly right about how high quality certain independent comics are, but as far as I can see, the quality is superficial. In spite of the quality of drawing, design of bad guys (one of whom, incidentally, reminds me of Vamp from Metal Gear Solid 2 and 4) and occasional flashes of brilliance, it is trapped within the cage of unoriginality, characters you struggle to relate to, and - at least on occasion - horrendous dialogue. It seems it may be a long wait before we see another golden age of graphic novels. Nobody seems to want to break the mould, Velica included. But until somebody does, I see a bleak future for the business.
23 years is a long time. It's a crying shame that in all those years, the spark of genius never quite hit.
One of the biggest icons of African American art is Kadir Nelson. This accomplished artist started drawing when he was only three years old. His early interest in the creative process grew as he did until he reached adulthood. Now Kadir Nelson is a driving force in the African American art scene today.
Nelson’s artistic abilities were apparent and obvious at a very young age. He could draw before he could write. He explains that "being an artist is part of his essential being and it is engendered within him". His natural talent has earned him a historic place in African American art in the United States and across the globe.
David and Goliathe RM
The artist began seriously delving into his craft at a young age of eleven. This pioneer of African American art has very early development in his artistic abilities and he began honing his craft at a remarkably young age as well. With guidance from his uncle this preteen grew into a magnificent artist of great magnitude, producing magnificent art pieces.
His natural abilities come as no surprise to his family. Kadir Nelson grew up in a creative environment surrounded by talented individuals who inspired and encouraged his craft. His uncle was a driving force behind his development and when Kadir was sixteen his high school art teacher took him under his wing.
This icon of African American art began painting in oil during his teenage years. He entered his paintings in competitions in the New York area. His endeavors in contests finally won him a scholarship to Pratt Institute in Brooklyn, New York. There he developed his skills to the remarkable quality we see in his projects today.
His list of accomplishments is astounding. This artist has managed to achieve great things at a relatively young age. His work has appeared on advertisements for Coca Cola, in Sports Illustrated magazine as well as in DreamWorks productions. His work can also be found in homes of people who collect African American art.
Perhaps his most accessible work can be found at your local bookstore. Kadir Nelson has illustrated several children’s books. These masterpieces of children’s literature represent African American art for a young audience. The work of this artist may inspire budding young creative types around the world.
Mood Indigo
With his eclectic style and his ability to capture a moment or a character this artist is certain to go down in African American art history as one of the greatest artistic forces of all time.
I, Dee4leeds, would like to apologise for not posting on Sunday. I know all you Dee4leedsers were disappointed I didn't post but that is because I couldn't think of a topic. That was until Ste arrived. Now together me and Prodigy will be reviewing TimeSplitters: Future Perfect. And in a more accurate way Dee.
What Makes It Worth Reviewing? -The Multiplayer: Perfectly balanced with weapons and additional fire options, customisable game modes and settings, variety of and the ability to create our own maps and a massive range of playable and amusing characters. A fuckton of amazing stuff basically combining to make an awesome game experience. It hurts me to admit this, but it is actually better than Halo multiplayer...Oh god, what am I saying.The truth, that's what you're saying. The "Glovener" was the best character...Headsprouter FTW
-The Replayability: It never got boring except after a whole summer of playing this goddam game. And that's not even an exaggeration, we whored it for days on end. We were starting to hallucinate by the end of it, one of our friends envisioned the gingerbread man straddling him.* It has recently come to our attention that the gingerbread man was gay... The Duck was bi.
The Craziness: The Story mode was groovy as hell, in one room for example, we had deers head on the mantelpiece only for the wall to collapse revealing a horrible mutated deer body corpse demon monster thing.At least Ace Ventura would of been happy.**Also I haven't played a game yet that has as many slick in jokes and witty lines than this one. One example being from openly effeminate Khallos holding a cat with "Me and my Pussy are going to have a lot of fun." And of course Headsprouter's renowned dry wit with "Rahhoooooraaaor."
What Should We Forget? -That Eventful Summer: As much as we once loved the game we can never touch it again, for we played with for too long and ruined it, sending it to the back of our minds never to be brought up again.Just like that fateful day with the little boy at the playground......What?
*Ste remains eerily stone faced,and Dee becomes increasingly arous...anxious.*
...*Uncomfortable silence*
RetroReview Score: 5/5 - ...
*For those who know him, he has long hair and his name rhymes with smiles. **Obviously you are as culturally aware as Dee and would get the Ace Ventura When Nature Calls reference, regarding the trophy room scene.
Always wanted to learn how to program, but didn't know where to start? Want to refresh your memory on a certain language after not using it for so long? Then this post is for you my friends as I take a look at two great resources for coding newbies and pros.
First up I would like to direct your attention to freeprogrammingresources.com (rightly named I'd say). Through that link is a huge link directory of tutorials, books, compilers, and source code! This should definitely be in everyone's bookmarks as the place to go for, well anything.
Now that first site may be of great use to someone who already knows how to code but what if you want a site dedicated to teaching you how to code. Look no further than W3Schools (sounds like a 3Rs site). Before I found W3Schools I was desperate to find an in-depth tutorial on anything coding related. But all I'd seem to find was book after book and more things I'd have to spend money on. If you give yourself a hour a day to go there who knows? You may be coding within the next month!
And finally, if you ever wanted to learn ruby (I didn't but it was awesome) then go to tryruby.hobix.com (hobix=Hobbits?). This page teaches you the basics of ruby in about 15 minutes, with a hands on tutorial! If you listened to all the sites I told you about earlier and aren't going to a single one, go to this one. At first glance I thought it was going to be boring interactive lecture, but it wasn't. It holds your attention span no matter how short it is. That's all for now, but stay tuned for next week when I (possibly) will preview a special exclusive ultra secret game!Penny for your thoughts Josh@TheThreeRs.co.uk
I'm not big on comics. I'll read Garfield Minus Garfieldor Dilbert or xkcdor Dinosaur Comics or Cyanide & Happiness - but there's not a great deal of others. Now, you may have noticed something about these comics. They're webcomics. I think JPEG, PNG, BMP or whatever else file format they're presented in is a good format for a comic. Print? Yes, it's fine - but I don't want to buy the rag that is the Daily Mail every day just so I can read its wonderful The Odd Streak comic strip (which is actually really good). The Internet? I can check it every day and get the latest instalment on my screen. Cute But Sad Comics does both.
CBSC has a smattering of online pictures - including a disturbing history of AIDS, which is best left on the web - and then there's print booklets of strips called Anthropomorphism In Action. I've got a copy of Volume 4, which you can also buy for just three quid (or you could, but it's yet to be added to the shop).
It's not what you'd call slick in its professionalism, for starters. With about a dozen pages sandwiched in between stapled red card, it's got a sort of homemade feel to it. However, this complements the cute, hand-drawn characters that feature within. They, by the way, include quite an eclectic mix: a lonely badger, droll bronchioles, a mystic cow and a nutty squirrel.
The best badger this side of Weebl's Stuff
Badgers aren't renowned for their media dominance. Besides the snake-fearing animated ones from Weebl's Stuff and the mashed potato fanatic of Bodger & Badger, can you think of another celebrity of the Mustelidae genus? Here's a new one for you, then.
The lonely badger comic, the predominate strip in this volume, is at stark odds with the high spirits of the other strips. It's this defiance of expectation which makes the sadness that bit more affecting. While the strip conveys a sense of sadness (and, of course, cuteness) and is well-drawn, it suffers from a slight lack of narrative to begin with, but quickly makes up for this enough to have you feeling sad by the final panel. The squirrel strip offers a manic squirrel on a quest for nuts - and it succeeds in presenting this story quite while and in an amusing way. That's all you can ask for, really.
Volume 4's front cover, showcasing the bronchioles
By far my favourite thing about Anthropomorphism In Action are the couple of bronchioles who appear in three strips - on the cover, and two inside. They're brilliant in all three. It's not to everyone's taste, but I find them fantastically funny. Surreal and meta-jokey in a Monty Python sort of way, the bronchioles should be commissioned for a daily newspaper. Their dry humour makes "Bronchioles At Christmas" one of my favourite comic strips I've seen recently.
Is Anthro... worth its £3 price? I don't think it is. However, I would pay that amount just so that the author is encouraged to go out and produce more of the great bronchioles and perhaps provide the badger with a glimmer of hope and happiness. So the price is justified and the comics are good.
Mbc Networking is a business working out of The United Kingdom, and comprises of Mbc Hosting and Mbc Designz. Mbc offers a wide range of services: including web and graphic design, web content management, flash design, hosting, and MMORPG creation. Backed up by a small but highly dedicated team of professionals working around the clock to provide great customer support, as well as affordable custom packages to suit the needs of all consumers, the sky is, as the proverb goes, the limit for Mbc.
As of the 21st November 2008, we at the Three Rs N3twork are proud to announce a working partnership with Mbc Networking.
I'm currently munching chocolates in my mouth, and I thought I'll add in some jokes I found around the net and from my friends.
Chocolate is Worth Crowing and Laughing About
Chocolate kindles passion and emotion as few things can. It makes us happy and feeds the soul. Besides eating it (over 51 pounds per person per year), people delight in talking about it and making jokes about it. Everything about chocolate makes us feel good.
I'm a true believer. I'm so passionate about chocolate. I've found favorite chocolate jokes cluster around three themes - healthy eating tips (most of which are far from true), flights of fancy, and self-confessions. The tips let you become a co-conspirator in being misled, while acting like the health benefits apply to you.
Healthy Eating Advice about Chocolate
Chocolate covered ginger, raisins, and cherries all count as fruit, so even if you're on a strict diet you can eat as many as you wish.
Achieve the perfectly balanced diet, eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate - they cancel each other out. Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It will take the edge off your hunger and you'll eat less.
If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, it may be a sign of a deeper problem. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy? Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. Chocolate is a health food.
Chocolate is derived from cacao beans.
Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived either from sugar beets or cane, both vegetables. And, of course, the milk/cream is dairy. So eat more chocolate to meet the dietary requirements for daily vegetable and dairy intake.
Flights of Chocolate Fancy
-- A young girl was at the dentist for a check up. With much tutting, the dentist examined all her teeth. Finally he announced crossly, "Young lady, you've been eating far too many sweet things. Several of your teeth need filling." "Oh goody!" she replied happily, "Can I have chocolate filling please?"
-- While walking in the woods Douglas saw a young fairy who had fallen into the river and bravely dived in to rescue her. In gratitude the fairy granted Douglas three wishes. He wished for a huge pile of gold, and "poof" there it was. Then he wished for a huge palace, again "poof" and there it was. Finally he wished he could be irresistible to all women. There was a blinding flash, a mighty roar and ... poof - he turned into a box of chocolates.
Self-Confessions
Seven days without chocolate makes one weak.
I never met a chocolate I didn't like.
Exercise is a dirty word...
Every time I hear it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
There's a thin person inside of me screaming to get out, but I keep her sedated with chocolate.
Nobody knows the truffles I've seen.
Money talks. Chocolate sings.
Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.
Problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car.
Solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose.
An entire garment industry would be devastated.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
Better than Chocolate Jokes; Eat Some First-Rate Chocolates
Also known as ‘The Fallout 3 Fiasco’.
Recently, Bethesda Softworks have taken a few direct hits to their ego from certain establishments over public relations moves that have gone down as well as a ‘yo momma’ joke in an orphanage. The studio has been attacked for their laziness, and even one of their recent shenanigans is acclaimed to be the beginning of a reign of a whole different type of videogame censorship. Fortunately for Bethesda; they have a friend in me. Personally, I believe that these attackers know as much about developing and producing a game successfully as I do about the Large Hadron Collider (how current, eh?). Yet Bethesda’s actions could, potentially, spur on a new wave of community-to-studio relations globally which may not be as successful as we’ve seen in the past. Unlike other articles of mine, perhaps some of my smarter readers will actually sympathise with my own viewpoints. Allow me to elaborate:
Bethesda Softworks vice president Pete Hines has stated that his company largely ignored advice from users during Fallout 3 development.
Dedicated Fallout fans and forum rioters swamped Bethesda with complaints about the more Oblivion-like direction it was taking the franchise.
Bethesda chose to stick with its own direction and only take "feedback from the people who are actually playing the game."
"When you're designing a game, you have this group of people on the inside who are working on it every day and who know everything about the decisions that are being made," he explained. "You don't just take a chunk of that, throw it out to the community and say, 'We don't know how this question works, so let's ask the fans.' You're working and changing every day - it's a constant, fluid process. It's not like we say, 'Okay, everything is done now, let's see what they say then go back and change it.'"
More important than forcing game changes based on what gamers want is testing the title in-house with those who developed it, says Hines.
"We're big believers in playing the game, putting things in and then letting folks see how it feels, as opposed to 'Oh, that sounds terrible!' It turns out that ideas that sound terrible, when slightly tweaked, can be fucking awesome in the game. And it's sometimes the case that awesome-sounding ideas will suck when you actually put them in. You're never a slave to how something is written on paper - you put it in the game and play it. You have to take feedback from the people who are actually playing the game."
Outrageous, eh? We’ve seen it before: Developers not listening to fan feedback and keeping things in closed beta leads to disastrous results. Recent example? Check out Age of Conan; they used open beta as a typical stress test, but they overlooked the thousands of bugs and holes which made sections of the game (especially later on) down-right unplayable simply because their in-house testing team had not discovered or reported them. When it was released, thousands of players complained about such errors, but Funcom totally ignored even the most popular threads of complaints, insisting that things were ‘working as intended’. Unfortunately, in this example the corporation was so stuck up and ignorant to their own playerbase that they paid dearly for it within days following launch.
But I do agree with Bethesda’s thinking, however. On a basic level, a single-player game (Fallout 3) is different from a MMO (AoC). With a MMO, you depend on your community to keep the thing alive; they pay for your tech staff, tech support, customer support, server upkeep and developers; putting food on the table for three hundred (or more) staff. When you make a decision to reject that – basically your only source of income for the next four years - then it isn’t a surprise that you’re going to get screwed in the arse. A strong community can also come up with the odd, reasonable new suggestion (such as an item or location) you can slap into the game in a future expansion. With a single-player game, you don’t really require that level of dedication from fans; their initial purchase of your product is all you aim for. Sure, you may opt to throw in a few patches after is something is terribly wrong with the game, but usually all bugs are ironed out during testing.
Single-player games are also severely limited. It may be ‘an open world’ but whoever plays the game is gonna get the same introduction cutscene and be encouraged to follow the same story. Sure, it’s an ‘open world’ but who gives a rat’s arse? You’re simply not going to play it as much as a MMO and thus the chances of bugs are cut down ridiculously by chance alone. Oblivion was so infested with bugs that it brought in professional biologists for a look, but recall that was some years ago now; they’ve learned how to test a game properly (we hope) and Bethesda are sticking to what they’re good at. Funcom (as well as their fellow genre-changing peers) made the giant leap from adventure games with a huge story and some amazing artwork into the gritty world of MMOs; it certainly was an interesting announcement, but it really didn’t go down too well when it came to making the actual game fun, eh? Alright, I’ll stop with the Conan hate now.
So if the fans ain’t being used for fly-swatting, but what about content creation? Well, as Peter suggests, Bethesda has been making games since some of these whiners were in nappies (some still are). Surely, they have refined their art of what and what not to include in gameplay now, even if they are experimenting with new features (like that weird mix of third-person shooter but RPG elements they’ve got going on) and will definitely have a direction for design in the story too. This means that the majority (and I do mean, 99.9%) of player suggestions are going to be a little… off. That is to say that incorporating a dragon battle or arming the player with a katana may be a little out of place. Sure, we all have our picture of an ideal game*, but this is being made by Bethesda – not you. No matter how much you love the series, or how much you’re paying for a game; you’re still not part of their staff and therefore not really qualified to try and determine what everyone wants while trying to keep your own direction: That is the really hard part of PR: Think Bruce in Bruce Almighty trying to keep up with all those prayers or, if you believe Jim Carrey to be an idiot** think Bender in Futurama in the episode where he accidentally becomes a god; trying to listen to everyone's suggestions at once and acting on them. Managing all those raging, hormonal followers whilst trying to still generate buzz for the game has been the downfall of many a community manager; if it isn’t balanced right, things could lean towards disastrous PR.
What’s my overall opinion? I’m fully in support of Bethesda ignoring their fans’ suggestions, but bare in mind I’m simply a glorified troll and they’re a highly experienced developer studio. I do believe that any major release nowadays must follow this trend; if only in part. It is important to always remember why you’re making the game: Is it for the fans? Or is it so anyone - including yourself - can play and you’re simply using the fans as a great, hearty backdrop and support base? I’m not saying ‘fuck the fans’ completely, but rather nudge studios to take the latter option over the former. Simply: If a studio is competent and has a open-minded, in-house team that are worth the money they’re paid in the first place, then there should be absolutely no reason to take spoonfuls of community feedback as gospel; especially considering how unrefined and spontaneous some suggestions can be. Unless, of course, the game itself relies on community support (See: Darkfall, opening of World of Warcraft) but even then strict moderation should be employed to make sure the power of the masses doesn’t become too great (think that class forums are hid nicely away in their own sub-section of the website). Communities should remember there is a fine line between support and making rude demands; don’t fall into the trap of being blasé or else the developer will really start to dislike you. We can all think of certain whiny arseholes we’ve encountered that just don’t know when to shut up.
Thoughts?
Melaisis is still a freelance writer for anything from The Escapist to PC Gamer UK. He helps run a daily blog over at The Three Rs - which deals with all sorts of cultural issues, from an alphabet using Halo corpses to cybersex.
Oh, a quick final word:Gamers in Australia who are upset about being stuck with an edited version of Fallout 3 can rest easy - it turns out the entire world is getting the same modified version you are.
After being refused classification by Australia's Office of Film and Literature Classification, a decision which effectively banned the sale of the game, changes were made to some parts of the game's content in order to make it more palatable to the country's censors. Bethesda Softworks has steadfastly refused to comment specifically about what modifications were made, but it's widely accepted that references to drugs, a staple of the Fallout games, were the cause of all the problems.
Oh come on; it’s hardly a landmark in game politics; all it is changing the names of a few drugs within the game - not affecting the overall experience in the slightest.
What, that we're all suffering for the fascism of the Australian government, and if this trend continues then the will of one absurdly conservative government on the other side of the world will end up having shockwaves on the global market? I never said it wasn't a bad thing but - as others have said - it is nothing to write home about. Sure, there is a possibility that other developers could take the same view as Bethesda's laziness and any alterations that are forced on them in one part of the world will be applied elsewhere, or that a single fascist government could dictate what the entire Western world plays but honestly; talk about panicking over a fire when there's only smoke and ashes. We've been worrying about censorship since Jack Thompson and what has changed in the industry, exactly?
Just because one studio decided to opt for the E-Z route when it came to manufacturing the game to get by censors doesn't mean that everyone will start doing it.
*My ideal game is actually worth another blog entry in itself: Basically, it’s about two main characters: The first is an ‘indigo adult’ who is pursued constantly by a mysterious racoon, which he slowly learns to live with and treats as a partner/weapon. The second character is a 25 year old retired J-pop star on the run from her dead sister (now an onryō) after a series of unfortunate events led to her death. Brought together by the walls of time and space collapsing, the two (alongside the racoon, with the player as the male lead) traverse a city together; the bond slowly growing as they seek to discover the undoing of the universe. Think of it being a mixture of Ico with Condemned or Fatal Frame, with horror elements stemming from John Dies At The End. Furthermore, I’d incorporate the lesser-used scary elements of videogames. You know how survival-horror games like to include ‘safe’ rooms so people can get their bearings, safe and calm down? Well such safe rooms would only appear to exist in my game. Furthermore, remember that part in Metal Gear Solid 2 where the S3 technology breaks the fourth wall and tells you to turn of your console? A scare like that is unexpected and genuinely frightening in a whole new way, I feel.
**I’ve loved him since he did a dinosaur impression in Series of Unfortunate Events.
Images subject to copyright laws. All are properties of their respective owners. News stories courtesy of The Escapist.
Lots of people around. Lots of people signing comics. Unfortunately, such individuals did little more than highlight mine and Dee's own ignorance of this niche. Hopefully Dee will remember the names and origins of such famous(?) faces, but I was simply impressed at how popular these folks were. Seriously, they were never sat around without being harassed by adoring fans. Again, praise to how well they dealt with such pressure. I was definitely more informed than Scott. Closest to the camera is Alex Marleev.
"Yeah, mate. We're just taking a few pictures. Just keep doing what you're doing!" Note the excitement on the face of the bloke in the Silver Surfer t-shirt.
Seriously, how these artists can do such detailed and good drawings in simply minutes is beyond me. Because it's their job.
I simply can't get over how popular these artists were, especially since many had only worked in the era of 90s Marvel and are running solo or spin-off projects now. Imagine what would happen if they bagged a large-scale science-fiction name (Abrams! JJ. Abrams!) or an infamous blogger or two. What's that Thought Bubble? You'd love for me to sign copies of Tommy Tutone CDs for the crowds of fans who love me!? I'd love to!
Even the indie folks were receiving some much-deserved attention from the crowds as they drew and coloured samples live. Again, I was severely impressed by the level of quality present.
The art scatted about on various tables was definitely... varied. As I'm sure Dee will agree - I would have happily browsed through all of the collections available for all to read for the duration of the day. Seriously, the level of quality even in the samples for some of these pieces - from independent comics - was amazing. I didn't think the detail and high quality of these prints was possible in such independent comics.
Cool. Its great how 'fan art' can reach such high standards.
Pictured (unless the programme is wrong): Doug Braithwaite (Secret Invasion: Thor), Barry Kitson (Amazing Spider-Man), Alex Maleev (Daredevil) and er... apparently 'hot new talent' David Lafuente (Ultimate Spider-Man Annual); all from the morning Marvel panel. Dee stayed to watch this. The panel was, in my opinion, the most interesting and humorous of the day. Having my comic specialty in Marvel, I felt more at home than in the Manga and independent panels. I was hoping to gain Thor's hammer from Doug but alas it did not happen. They were often self-censoring themselves, knowing the information they held about the future of Thor, Spider-man etc. was wanted by the audience. I did have the urge to ask them "DC or Marvel" but they all seemed fond of both.
Speak up, Doug! People are going to sleep on you!
The Independent Comics Panel took place in the very swanky Alea Casino. Whilst the picture makes the thing look a tad boring, I thoroughly enjoyed it and it wasn't simply the lot of them moaning about how the comic industry was inaccessible for budding talent. Despite the entire thing being totally ad lib, all of the participants raised good points. The three main participants (Kieron Gillen, Marc Ellerby and Jamie McKelvie avec host) presented the topics surrounding that side of the industry - from getting a publisher to joining anthologies - in a very down-to-Earth way that made it accessible to people such as me and Dee; who both didn't have a bloody clue when we first walked in. They deserve massive kudos for teaching us - and the others in the room - something. If you wish to learn more about this aspect of the business, then I suggest you check out any editorial by the above. To Google!
Huzzah, now RAM Raider has a new picture to replace Kieron avec beard on the Awards page!We even left it un-watermarked so you can use it, Rammy! ;)
I think its quite fitting to end on this picture, as it perfectly summarises the spirit of Thought Bubble: People coming together to look at comics, socialise and draw. Wait, is that a bird on the top of that book?! Now the post is over I will now enjoy a nice box of Pocky bought at Thought Bubble!
Thanks to everyone who attended Thought Bubble. Even greater thanks to the organisers who pulled it off with such efficiency, as well as the exhibitors. If we passed your stand on the day and didn't get back to you, drop me a line on SConstantine@thethreers.co.uk and we'll organise some press. If any of you are budding artists, we're on the look-out, so feel free to send me an e-mail to the above address too. Any of you are open to comment/plug your site in the section below.
Written by: Melaisis (Scott Constantine) and Dee4leeds (Dietrich Jeffreys)
Hi guys, Scott here. Last Saturday we had the distinct privilege of covering one of the fastest-growing alternate-culture events in the North of England: Thought Bubble. This post works as a (albeit random) running narrative of the events we witnessed throughout the day. My notes are in blue and Dee's are in red. Please note that our commentary may not be as extensive as first predicted. This is, after all, our first major press event (sure, we've covered gigs and whatnot before, but really) and for the majority of the time, we were simply engrossed in our environment and learning so much stuff to actually focus on making notes on the way. Due to the length of the post, I've decided to split it into two parts and both will appear on the usual TheThreeRs.co.uk (as the watermark suggests) and the upcoming 'MyScen3.com'. Our high-quality photos were provided by Photography 1 (hopefully he'll comment this post with a link to his new website?). Excuse my own tongue-in-cheek take on things; I honestly did enjoy myself.
TooLong;Didn'tRead Version: Awesome experience. Highly recommended. Look at the pretty pictures.
Let's Begin!
We arrived at the swanky venue (Saville's Hall, Leeds) shortly after ten, after some delay. The nerdy feel was upon us immediately, as patrolling the queue outside was a bunch of the folks dressed up from the New Jedi Order (again, hopefully they'll comment this with a link to their site). It was a great start, and the theme of cosplay and people disregarding all social norms was to be repeated throughout the day.
Notably, despite their name, there were no Jedis present with the NJO. :'(
Which is just as well, as they would have certainly been blasted to pieces instantly!
Its a shame any of these folks didn't enter the cosplay competition later on, actually. I'd say they'd definitely win, considering how every outfit has to be custom-made to their size.
We stepped inside the small lobby and picked up our passes. As you can see, the line of paying punters was pretty large; a great sign for the scene in the city. Especially considering that Thought Bubble has had quite minimal publicity (although we plugged 'em!). Kudos to the level of professionalism conducted by the staff, too, even when talking with such strange, dressed up characters. I think they were enjoying the atmosphere more than the actual visitors, definitely something to tell the children. "I helped protect the Stormtroopers."
The place was packed. I believe Dee's first words to me were something along the lines of 'Oh. My. God; Nerd Overload' so take that how you wish. I had not expected so many people there for so early in the morning, yet there was the masses - ready to barter their way into comicdom. Considering myself a nerd, it was a compliment.
Really speaks for itself. This picture really demonstrates the willingness and eagerness and the designers to show the visitors their work.
Banners such as these littered the entire show floor. I think we were all severely impressed by the level of detail and scale of the things. Big and pretty, eh? And I'm not necessarily referring to the woman on the front.
Hell, if the comic was anywhere near as epic as the backpanel, I would certainly pick it up!
Pandas. In giant robots. In a comic. Need I say more?
More panda-related madness. Except this time on t-shirts. We didn't buy any, mind. Sorry.
Whilst this guy's freebies are currently sat on my desk, waiting to be reviewed, the guy who was sat next to him provided us with Ironwerkz and was really quite nice.
What is The Hunter? We don't know. Why has this man got stacks of free samples? We don't know that either. What we do know is that he provided some nifty art.
The show floor was stacked with such merchandise. Everything from unreasonably hairy models of the Japanese TV show character 'Domo' to Wonder-Woman dolls. If it exists in comics, it was probably available as a 6-inch figurine in a box. And viewable on Scott's shelf.
Why am I posting this guy's picture? Whyever not!? Who can say no to that jacket!? Maybe because his art was very detailed?
My hand looks so bony! Anyway, during the day this picture and a few others was laid out and bypassers were given pens and asked to colour in a section of the drawing. As expected, by the end of the event they were covered in Internet meme references and 'creative' use of... different combinations to cause some really original effects.
Check out the ruddy novel this girl is writing at the top of the paper!
Cosplay (the act of people dressing up as their favourite Anime/Manga/TV Show/Movie character) was a very prominent theme during the 'Fest; encouraged by how such dedicated fans gained free entry.
"Yarr!"
Hah! Octavius started off the day in-character, but I feel he was sick of people asking where Spider-Man was by lunch. On a related subject: I was surprised that no one had come as Spider-Man, or is that some sort of ultra-nerdy faux pas?
It seems this red team failed to notice the blue amongst them! Its a spy!
Er... I don't remember taking this picture, Steve!
No, it wasn't there to promote the DVD release of Kung Fu Panda. Just more panda related antics at Thought Bubble!
Dee reckoned that Princess Zelda (above) would easily win the afternoon cosplay contest. I could see where he was coming from; her costume was excellent and really detailed. However, it occurred that the competition was won by someone not even Okatu-related: A (albeit chunkier) Doctor Who. Damn it, why didn't L from Death Note win!? I did later give my vote to Doctor Who, who played the character best.
The miner/marine, thing. Dressed up for the Deadspace exhibit. The costume must have been damn heavy, but it looked awesome. Available on Wii? ...no.
The first part of the DeadSpace exhibit. The admirable bloke in the suit came in the second section. The first segment was simply the above: A trailer about the game. The latter half was a gameplay experience, which was great 'cause I'd already played it and owned serious amounts of arse (although Dee will probably dispute this). Anyway, when we were being talked-up to come into the little crate where they'd set up, I mentioned how buggy the game was. The PR guy informed me that he worked for EA and my sentiments would sincerely be passed on. I won't make a comment on that, because I don't mind the publisher in the slightest (don't play Spore or Mass Effect on the PC, so DRM is a load of irrelevant nonsense to me). Still, what is said and what is done are two separate things. If you were under-18 and couldn't enter the exhibit: Have no fear, as it really wasn't worth it.
These guys were great. You've got to respect blokes who openly attempt to publicise a comic called 'Fetish Man'. I'm not sure if they were in cosplay or actually dress like that, though. Fetish? Man? Where was I?
Sincerest apologies in advance. This article was originally intended to bear my first foray into serious reviewing - the 'R' that I am yet to touch. However, despite my attempts to bite my tongue and write something serious and insightful, the sheer frustration induced by watching an independent film has crushed my once-vibrant soul. I swear, if one more irritating thing decides to besmirch my day, I'm going to become a vengeful hermit, living in an underground cave 30 miles beyond the farthest reaches of civilisation, and slowly perfecting my crazed blueprint for a death ray.
So, the film I was intended to review. Ironwerkz. Ironwerkz, as it proudly professes via it's web page, was commissioned by the YMPA as part of the UK Film Council's Digital Shorts scheme. The YMPA stands for 'Yorkshire Media Production Agency'. If you didn't know, don't worry about it. Neither did I before a quick Google search. Now, I'll try to be positive, but forgive me if I rip the entire independent film scene to shreds during the course of this article. Anything that tries to be too 'artsy' or metaphorical is never going to gain my seal of approval. And that's where Ironwerkz, along with many independant films, leave their throats exposed.
I really don't see why so many small time film makers have to make their films so artsy. Nothing is straight forward. It's all left to your imagination - which is a problem to me. If I watch a film, I expect it to make sense. I don't want to have to make sense of it. Because then it's not a film, it's a puzzle. I didn't want a puzzle. There's a reason why all Hollywood Blockbusters have a plot, a natural progression, and plenty of internal explanation of events. It's because I'm not some loon who speaks for himself. Very few people like having to work out the meanings behind a visual production. People like sense. People like explanations. And more importantly still, people like plots. Which was something that I didn't find a trace of within Ironwerkz. Not even an attempt at a plot. Somewhere down the line, the brains behind it all sat down, and asked themselves - "Should I include a plot? Or should I just cram some hidden meaning down people's throats, and say it's artistic?" They chose the latter.
I understand it must be hard to fit a plot into a 15 minute film, so on this count, I'll let it slide. It hasn't pissed me off severely enough to make me write a full, horrible rant yet. But oh dear - it won't stop trying. It's determined to aggravate me, in spite of my threats to become a death-ray building recluse. Now, in addition to the lack of plot, reasoning, sense or vague suggestion to just what the fuck is going in, the characters don't speak. At all. They laugh, on one solitary occasion, for the space of about half a second. But speaking? No, that's been outlawed in the weird, quasi-Victorian island on which the 'film' takes place. Sorry, I don't like calling it a film. I'll try to refer to it, from here on out and more often than not, as a production. It annoys me a little less to give it a vaguer label.
Again, this is artsy bollocks. I want my characters to say things, to communicate with each other - or it just becomes utterly disjointed from reality. You don't walk around in life never speaking to anyone, ever. So to watch a series of characters doing so on screen... It puts up this brick wall, between yourself and the characters, the production. It refuses to allow you to immerse yourself in it. They've erected a large electrified fence, with an accompanying sign that reads "Piss off." I don't like that. I don't like to be told to piss off by a living, breathing human. But when a film more or less says the same thing, I get really annoyed. I wanted to be able to dive into the production, associate with the characters, understand their emotions, and appreciate the article as whole. But as soon as I do so, I'm pushed away, and find myself sat back in my seat, wondering what I've done to offend them so much they won't even talk.
By now, I've cultivated quite a rivalry with independant productions like Ironwerkz. Perhaps I'm just a cynical, nihilistic, and general unpleasant person... Scrap that. I know I'm a cynical, nihilistic, and general unpleasant person. But none the less, I've been offended. By a recording. It didn't even have to acknowledge me to offend me. It probably offended me through intentionally and repeatedly refusing to acknowledge me. It didn't want to respect me. It didn't want to explain itself to me. It didn't want to understand what I expected of it. I'm not sure if Ironwerkz is part of a small group of independant productions that do this, or whether it's a genre-wide habit. I'd rather not know.
But I'm being negative again. To be fair, Ironwerkz wasn't a total slap in the mouth. It has it's redeeming features. The CGI was quite impressive, even for the increasing quality you see in all corners of life. The musical score was, though nothing inspirational, well above satisfactory. The acting, for the most part, was reasonable. At times, notably at the beginning, it was pretty stiff, and generally unbelievable. Moving onwards, the standard slowly climbed, until it was of bearable quality. And the character design was probably the one aspect of the film that genuinely made me take notice - at least, in a positive sense. Those of you that read my previous post will know that I take originality in character design very seriously. It gives a poor production the chance to make itself stand out. Ironwerkz recognises this, and takes advantage of it. The mechanical metal-mouthed monster of a man, who plays quite the irritating character, looks remarkable. If I could commend the production for just one thing - it would be for the appearance of this character, and this character alone.
Ironwerkz tries. I can say that for it. It's a valiant attempt. However, its attempts are focused poorly. It takes a decent idea, then sucks out sense, injects morals and messages, smears it with the film making equivalent to modern art, and throws it out there as a film. To some, this will probably be a masterpiece. Certainly, to someone more accepting of the scene on a whole, it will receive generally favourable reviews. But today, it was my turn to review. And I'm sorry, but I like films that feel like the finished article. If I wanted to use my imagination, I'd make a film myself, not patch up somebody else's.
Oh, and, since I couldn't be bothered using my own mind, I decided to research online what, exactly, Ironwerkz was supposed to represent.
"In an isolated Gothic junkyard, a boy finds forbidden love with a girl from the outside world and dreams of escaping his repressive family. But his father and grandfather arrange a surprise party that will change his life forever."
Having seen the production, I kind of understand how it could represent this. Kind of. I only wish it would have made it more clear. Then again, I suppose having a cast of mutes can do that.
Mel's Note: I also watched Ironwerkz and found it quite amusing, but I'm not sure in what way. As Hash not-so-subtly suggests: It is an arty film but the message really required to be refined a little more before being put into production. A great concept, but ruined by a low budget and hazy writing.
I was looking through articles until I saw a few of Kabbalah. Maybe it's famous and I'm lame enough not to know it, but I really wasn't aware of what it is.
The Ari was a landmark figure in the history of Kabbalah. He transformed the centuries-old Kabbalistic method so that Kabbalah was no longer a wisdom reserved for unique individuals with divine souls. The method he created was a preparation for the modern age, when masses of people would begin using the wisdom of Kabbalah for spiritual ascent.
The Ari was born as Isaac Luria Ashkenazi, in 16th century Jerusalem. He lived at the dawn of the technological era, when the Middle Ages were being rapidly replaced by the Renaissance, and the first sprouts of a new civilization began to emerge. But humanity was not undergoing just technological and cultural development. People also began to develop spiritually, to yearn for spiritual elevation and to discover the source of life. Precisely this new desire that emerged in humanity allowed the Ari to reshape the Kabbalistic method, in order to adapt it to the new spiritual desires of the masses.
Beginning with a very young age, he became interested in sacred texts and devoted all his time to studying Kabbalistic texts, such as the Holy Scriptures. Very quickly, he absorbed all the Kabbalistic knowledge that was attained before him and became a renowned spiritual teacher at the young age of 35.
The Ari headed a Kabbalistic school in a small town in Northern Israel called Tzefat. There, he expounded his spiritual attainment and the wisdom of Kabbalah, but he did not simply teach the things others before him had attained. He presented the Kabbalistic wisdom in a completely new way, and later generations would study the spiritual world using primarily his books.
But as fate would have it, he taught for just a year and a half before passing away at the age of 36. Of all his students, he felt that only one student had understood him enough to continue studying his spiritual teaching. This student was 28 year old Chaim Vital, and in the year and a half he had studied with the Ari, he wrote down everything he heard. When the Ari passed away, Chaim Vital was the only disciple allowed to continue and publicize the Ari's work.
All the existing texts of the Ari's Kabbalistic teaching are the notes Chaim Vital took during that year and a half. They comprise about 20 volumes, of which the most important text is The Tree of Life. This text examines the origin of all life and the essence of Creation or man. Most importantly, it talks about the general force of Nature that governs everything and brings everything into existence. The Ari called this force "Upper Light." Here is an excerpt from the book The Tree of Life:
Behold that before the emanations were emanated and the creatures were created,
The Upper Simple Light had filled the whole existence.
And there was no vacancy, such as an empty atmosphere, a hollow, or a pit,
But all was filled with Simple, Boundless Light.
And there was no such part as head, or tail,
But everything was Simple, Smooth Light, balanced evenly and equally,
And it was called the Endless Light.
The Ari's great achievement was that he renovated the entire Kabbalistic method that existed before him for thousands of years - the method of attaining the Upper Light. Before him, the method was intended only for special people whose souls already possessed unique spiritual qualities. After the Ari, the method could be used by the masses, by anyone who truly desires spiritual ascent, regardless of age, gender or nationality. Thanks to the Ari, anyone can now engage in the wisdom of Kabbalah, find out about the purpose of Creation, and attain a sensation of the Upper Light.
Moreover, the Ari paved the way for Kabbalah to become a modern science. He was the first Kabbalist to expound the wisdom about the spiritual world in a modern, scientific language. Before him, Kabbalists had stated the same knowledge in a mysterious, concealed language of legends, fantastical stories and the like. Their texts could be properly interpreted only by other Kabbalists, and remained hidden to the uninformed reader.
Thus, the Ari laid the foundations for modern Kabbalah, creating a method that responded to people's new spiritual desires in his generation. The Kabbalistic method used in the world today by millions of people is also based on the Ari's work, and his book The Tree of Life remains a fundamental textbook used by modern students of Kabbalah.
Hence, the Ari is a man of great achievements and dreams, indirectly building the modern Kabbalah.
Written by: Reload92 When thinking about one word that could summarize iminlikewithyou one word stood out from the rest, addicting. I would swear to it. Iminlikewithyou's games will hook you in and keep you, maybe even for hours. Sure, there may be only 6 games on the site, but they're all of high quality, multiplayer, and very enjoyable. But the main reason why I'm reviewing iminlikewithyou is because it shows how far casual gaming has come in terms of socially and interactivity.
To start off when you first come to the site you don't immediately have to sign up (like other sites) but can play any one of the games as "lameguest". This already was a positive for me as I don't have to bother with signing up at first. Down the road though, when you start talking to the wonderful community and making friends you'll find the prospect of making an account more and more appealing. And when you finally do make an account the perks that come with it add on to the experience. You get the whole social network experience, friends, a "wall", photos, leaderboards/ranking system and more.
But the most entertaining aspect of iminlikewithyou is the games. They resemble games you've played before, but with a unique twist. For example Blockles is a Tetris like game except the fact that you're going head to head with up to 7 other players, and using items to sabotage your opponents. Besides the fact that every game has that magical replay value that keeps you coming back the social and competitive aspect of the games should hold you on their own.
When reviewing game sites the main thing it comes down to is how much "fun" you had. I can tell you, for sure, that I had a blast. I hope you do to. Iminlikewithyou gets a 5/5. You can find me at http://iminlikewithyou.com/#/profile/Reload92
Note: This post is at NBC and BBC Three pace in the US and UK respectively. So potential spoilers for those behind.
Let's face it. Heroes: Season 3: Book 3: Part 1: Villains has sucked. But what has made it so terrible thus far? And how could it be improved? I, Dee4leeds, will try to answer these questions. (But maybe his ideas will suck... who knows? Vicious circle!)
What's Sucking?
And by that I do mean in terms of awesomeness, not the antics of Nathan and Tracy/Niki/Barbara!
Mohinder Suresh: Wow, you're a fly. Wow, you had sex with Maya. Wow, you created a formula a few episodes ago which was going to end the world and now everyone has forgotten about it. The purpose of his character in the earlier seasons was to ground the show in reality and, because of his lack of powers, to show how special those with powers were. Now he has powers, meaning every main character has made one act of super power.
Matt Parkman: So you ended up in Nigeria, saw his future and adopted a turtle. All in a days months work for our very own police officer. Now all he has to do is make Daphne love him, simple. Except that in this show they'll both die and be reborn before that even happens... if it does.
Nathan Petrelli: Heroes very own Jack from Lost. Moody, large beards to show how desperate they are and simply annoying. So you have daddy issues, doesn't all TV charcters these days?
Tracey Strauss: We wanted you dead! They killed you. We breathed a sigh of relief. But now your back (in pog form.) Whiny, useless and hindering the development of the show. So you have a synthetic ability, what does that mean in terms of the show? Well. Nothing really. Just seems to be a set up for sex scenes with you and Nathan. So you were created, what does that mean in terms of the show? It means the writers can kill you off and bring you back again.
Hiro Nakamura and Ando Masahashi: Ando died, no wait, he didn't. Hiro won't time travel, no wait, he did. He can't trust Ando, no wait, he can. Contradiction after contradiction. Maybe a proof reader is needed for their stories.
Claire Bennett and Friends: I decided to group Claire, Meredith and Sandra in one group because as of now they really haven't done much outside of each other. Claire wants to grow up, Meredith wants to be a Woodstock mother and Sandra wants to learn the ways of Meredith. Though the concept is not that suckish, the way it's being written is.
Peter Petrelli: So you lost your powers. Had they have been some sort of event to it, not simply him hugging his father, I would of been for this. Now he's got even more of a reason to be all emo-y and gravelly voiced.
Gabriel Gray/Sylar: Though his story has pretty much gone from strength to strength, (every season) one event with him this series has made him suck... slightly. The instant redemption because Angela is your mother.
How To Improved?
Kill: Tracey Strauss and Nathan Petrelli. What did they add to the story overall? A get-out clause to the season 1 finale and a make shift cliffhanger for season 2 finale (But that's just Nathan, Tracey hasn't added anything.)
Kill: Daphne and the Turtle. They are holding Matt back! Arthur killed Matt's dad and you'd have to be a very cold person not to want revenge. Creating "The New Team Extreme*" with Matt, Hiro, Sylar and Peter being the team. Sylar on the inside and Matt being the only one with powers left could control Hiro and Peter.
Rethink: Claire Bennett and Friends. Good idea but maybe put them in a situation that isn't easily got out of. Doyle's birthday party is not an example.
Remember: Dead=Dead.
Kill or Depower: Mohinder Suresh. For the reason I wrote above.
Add: An end date! I need to know I'll get answers in the end.
Also if Time Kring is reading this and thinking "Hells Yeahs" then just email me and I'll become a new writer for you.
Whilst you're all waiting for our Thought Bubble write-up to chime into existence, allow me to present you with some 'elevator music'; some down-time so I can explain a major theme behind all blogs in N3twork that you may not have otherwise considered. I'll keep it simple, but for the long-term fans, this post may actually prove useful.
You see, whenever one of us makes a post on any of our blogs, we still use 'aliases', despite our real names being visible on our user profiles. To be honest, we simply do this out of tradition more than anything. Besides, it has some positive too and bends our destinies slightly in the shape towards Internet celebrity-dom. It is easier to remember catchy or slightly odd nicknames than full, pretty boring full titles. The only time it really proves an issue is if others cannot pronounce our aliases (like in my case: It's Mel-Ay-Si-Us, due to it actually originating from a typo, but I'll cover that in a moment) or if we're doing business with people unfamiliar to the trade and they're all a bit 'so er... you call yourself something you're not?'. The majority of outsiders just don't get it, which is fine really; they know my real name and therefore the use of nicknames or similar terms is only helpful to Internet readers (which probably know us from other sites where we use the same persona anyway).
Therefore, I've complied a short guide to explain why and where our aliases come from. My fellow writers: If I get the origin wrong, then I profusely apologise and feel free to correct me:
[Me]laisis: Contrary to what the main discourse of this Angsty Me entry suggests, my name was simply taken from the first game I ever played online, the legendary RTS Age of Mythology. General 'Melagius' is an egocentric Greek commander whose attitudes online - at the time - were something I reprised. I fully intended to copy his name completely to use online, but I was an illiterate idiot at the time and a typo later I became 'Melaisis'. Due to the rarity of the name and its very roots in my beginnings on the Internet, it stuck.
Dee4leeds: I've always assumed that Dee's online alias came from his love of Leeds United - the football team. I've never actually confirmed this, so I'm kinda just winging it on that presumption. The '4leeds' part of his name has become pretty important too; in case people don't realise where we're based. He also makes a very blatant point that the 'Leeds' part of his name is to be spelled with a lower-case 'l'. Dunno why, though.
Prodigy: Ste is hardly the prodigal son of blogging and - again - I'm assuming his alias comes from the pseudo-trance/dance troupe of the same name.
Thor (and by extension) HashpipeOfDoom: I've coupled these two together due to their former status of Templar Truths writers. Thor, I assume, takes his name from the Norse god (which bares a great resemblance to the origins of my own alias, as Thor was a prominent figure in AoM). Hashpipe's alias is - I reckon - done for comedy effect. Hell, it made me laugh the first time I heard it.
Nicolaaaxo: All our current female contributors appear to stick to simplicity and use their real names and Nicola is no exception. This is definitely understandable and excusable, especially if they're new to the whole 'being published on the Internet' scene and an appropriate alias hasn't had time to ferment. I feel Nicola's writer name on The Three Rs bares a strong resemblance to the title of her old, exceedingly entertaining-yet-bitchy blog and I had hoped that such themes carried forward to her work here. They haven't really, which is just as well for the audiences which are so easily offended at the likes of Angsty Me.
Faith ._. Love: Have faith in love? Love brings faith? A cute emoticon in the middle? Who knows? I haven't had chance to inquire as to where Candice's name comes from, but the light, cutesy nature of her alias is a sharp contrast to the deep writings and articles she chooses to feature.
Reload92: I picked Reload to join our writing team on The Three Rs due to his proficient and bloody good articles up on Attention All Friends. AAF was a blog about videogames, so I assume the 'Reload' part of Josh's name comes from a passion for FPSes or guns in general (he is American, after all*). If you have to guess where the suffix '92' comes from, then I'll drop you a hint: Its not the date his converse were made.
Raihan: Last, but not least, is Raihan. I don't believe there's any underlying theme or message behind Rai's name, aside from it being - well, her name. It is simple, which is pretty much the antithesis of her forthcoming writing project for us, the fruits of which should blossom next month.
Honourable Mention - Jesus2nd: Three Rs artist and occasional guest writer. I assume Sam's alias comes from the fact he believes himself to be Christopher Eccleston playing the second reincarnation of Jesus, or something.
Hello! So today was the somewhat highly anticipated Comic Convention in Leeds. It was the second year and we had high hopes.
And they weren't dashed! The day was a thoroughly enjoyable day and did exactly what it says on the tin. We've got lots of photos and a big review of the day coming soon, so keep coming back to TheThreeRs.co.uk for as many Stormtrooper and Cosplay pictures than you can shake a stick at!
I was browsing through the newspaper this morning, when I saw an article a few days ago about children becoming more and more obese, and diet pills are coming up.
With the changing of time and trend, people are becoming more and more health conscious and trying to avoid any possible disease, severe or not.
In these days obesity is the major issue for people as welcome of many dangerous diseases. Million of people are practising a lot of weight-management methods, only to avoid obesity, because the more dangerous disease through obesity, which includes heart attack, high blood pressure , diabetes, bones and joint problems and even some form of cancer.
The commonly used diet pills are:
Didrex:
Phendimentrazine:
Phentermine:
Alli Diet Pill:
Acomplia:
Many people take these diet pills because they have components that actually targets the control of food and tobacco intake into the body, and diet pills works as appetite suppressant and are instrumental in curtailing intake of calories.
But before start the treatment with any of diet pills it is advisable that one must consult with his/her doctor. So what are you thinking? Take the first step towards your dream to become slim with diet pills. With this you will not only get the desired shape but also form some good habits in you get de-shaped again.
Diet pills might not work all the time. There might be side-effects, you have to think before actually consuming them.
I would advise that exercise might just work better, like running etc, instead of controlling your food intake.
I first discovered The Long Distance forum when causally browsing Facebook. Social networking sites are, after all, quite an appropriate location to advertise a site dedicated to romance and the upkeep of relationships, specifically designed around longer distances. The idea brought out the more sadistic side of my personality, as I have fond memories of poking fun at the so-called 'Emos' on Gaia's Life Issues sub-forum, who always claimed that their life was definitely worse than the next person. Initially, I thought TLD would follow the same premise; attracting a weird mix of the socially inept, perverted freaks and lovers with outrageously low self esteem.
Fortunately, my ignorant assumptions were proved wrong. TLD includes nothing of the above. No whining losers, no desperate old men. In fact, the forum is mostly composed of like-minded, nice people who are willing to discuss their relationship (long distance or otherwise). Certainly, there's a mix of opinions here, but views are not forced down throats at every turn. Due to the decent amount of moderation and small community, people are actually considerate of one another. This is definitely a boon to the site, especially if the subject matter to be discussed in the threads could be of a delicate nature. Tactfulness appears to be the name of the game at TLD, whilst simultaneously it seems difficult to come across any taboo. In this sense, TLD works a lot like the original concept of forums: Discussion about topics (consisting of various degrees of seriousness) online where, despite the anonymity, people still remain open, honest and don't abuse the fact that they are not in the same time zone or proximity as the other posters. In essence, its a very relaxed, moderated (but not intrusively so) atmosphere that people can feel at ease in when talking about issues that may be very personal.
Aside from the altruistic spirit that fuels about ninety percent of humanity giving you motivation to post, how about some prizes? Indeed, a series of competitions has been promised to keep contributors to the site coming back time after time. The first, currently in progress, consists of the most active member who has made the most genuine posts by the 1st of December being given the chance at a choice of one out of three rather sweet prizes: Video edition of an iPod Nano, 1.3 megapixel webcamera for both PC and Mac and a USB phone for Skype. For a first stab at getting new members in, these rewards are rather special (we haven't even put on a proper competition yet, heh!) and are definitely worth going after.
The only thing TLD lacks at the moment, is more members. I'm well aware that The Three Rs sports an audience of sophisticated readers, so why don't you guys open up a little more and head on over to the forum to contribute? It is a more interactive and viable option than simply reading my Angsty Me entries, after all. Pop on over and have some fun. Heck, to promote our own community interaction I've signed up myself (under 'Melaisis', as per) so get going!
I'm sure that many of you have been in relationships. Both of you stay all the whole night talking about your future, your dreams, thinking about how long you'll last, and personal stuff. Awh, how sweet could that be? But does it seem to you that the relationship gets heavier and more meaningful as you both stopped talking about all those?
In the beginning, things were great. There was a level of trust and open communication that created intimacy and understanding. So, what happened to that? Where did it go and how can you get it back?
My sister used to think she was noble to control what came out of her mouth, what she said to her boyfriend. But what she was doing was ruining her relationships. There was no relationship. She was cutting herself off from others and never allowing them to know her. They never knew what she was thinking or feeling or needing.
Some people withhold from their partner and add an extra zinger -- they put on a show of pain and discomfort in order to punish them. It's an effort to communicate just how much pain they're in. But none of it's verbalized. It's a show of the pain.
When you start keeping secrets and withholding,.. when you cut off the sharing of life force between you,... you're cutting off the intimacy in your relationship. Even if you think you're protecting your partner from painful or embarrassing thoughts - it's still destroying your relationship.
Relationships require sharing... both our dreams and desires along with our doubts and fears.
What are you feeling and what needs of yours are being met or not? ...
Sometimes when a quarrel occurs, or when the other partner is unaware of what they did, you simply have to say and ask, like a request.
Often, a comment without a request will be taken as blame... which will lead to fixing, fighting or fleeing. Don't leave your poor partner hanging.
Paul and I recommend asking, "Would you tell me what you heard me say?" (Avoid saying 'could'- it implies they aren't intelligent enough to repeat you. And avoid saying "What did I say?" because what you said and what they heard are two different things.)
Sometimes, try to avoid getting into blaming and fault behind the feelings and needs. That tends to end up in a free-for-all about evaluations and judgements - who's right and who's wrong. Try to stick with feelings, needs and requests.
Normally, unless it's something obvious, a feeling that both of you share, a hint would do just fine.
However, if you actually are trying to communicate with a person who isn't aware, having small hints aren't enough. They won't understand and they'll just take it as being unreasonable.
...Because this time, I'm dropping my usually cynical rants and appraisal of novelty ideas for something a bit, well, more scienc-y. Science Fiction-y, to be precise. I've always been quite the aficionado of Science Fiction films, tv shows and video games, and, of late, I've started to ponder over which of the fictional races depicted across my scope of fiction would rule supreme. I've narrowed down my list of best alien races to those who are the most unique and fearsome, not, by rule of thumb, the most well-known. Not all of these are strictly alien in origin, but they all encompass the spirit of science and technology by some means - which is the only qualification required.
Introducing the first of several contenders, one of my personal favourite villains from television - a race that was never utilised as well as it could have been due to the cancellation of the show on which they first appeared. Stargate SG-1 has left our screens, with several direct-to-TV movies wrapping up the loose ends of the story. And for these brilliantly designed baddies, The Ark of Truth saw their untimely undoing. The Ori, who long ago 'ascended' to a higher plane of existence, are one of the most unique alien races out there - not just because of their intriguing design and backstory, but because of the way in which they encompass both devout religion and terrifying technology in a fearsome co-existence of powers which seems not to be able to exist on our own planet. Of course, being on a higher plane of existence (which effectively grants the Ori god-like powers over our own, measly level), the heroes of SG-1 never really do direct battle with the Ori. Instead, they battle the Priors, led by The Doci - who, by many accounts, is probably more creepy than the 'Gods' he represents. Of course, The Ori, being the villainous swine they are, are not true Gods - instead, they fool people into believing their "Path of Origin" (An invented religion), and wipe out anyone who stands against them. It gets a bit confusing now, since being worshipped gives The Ori some kind of additional power to do something or other. It's not really well explained within the show, though I feel it could have been, given a few extra seasons.
Essentially, The Ori are false Gods. But unlike the Gou'ald, the previous main villains of the Stargate Franchise who also boasted to be Gods, the Ori prove a little more difficult to prove wrong. Because, whilst they aren't actually Gods, they're as close to being so as any non-deific being can be, and certainly have power incomprehensible by our own simple minds. They only appeared in Two Seasons of Stargate SG-1 and the culminating TV movie, but prove brilliant baddies none the less. And the Priors they send to do their work have a truly original design, which many modern fictional races have. The scarification across the faces, the lost eyes, and the gothic robes create an impression of a person you really wouldn't want to piss off.
The Second Race I'd like to introduce are a little better known amongst the wider Science Fiction community - and even beyond it. In fact, it's pretty safe to say that they are the most recognisable fictional alien race within the country, possibly the world. Joining us from the Doctor Who franchise come The Daleks, near-unstoppable envoy of ultimate destruction. The trick to the Daleks is simple. They just want you dead. They don't want to be worshipped, they don't want you to work for their empire, and they definitely don't want you to breathe for a second longer. Their technology, whilst differing vastly from that displayed by the aforementioned villains, is staggering in power. They cannot be hit by simple projectiles (unless you concentrate your fire, anyway), they can fly through the vacuum of space, they descend upon you in fleets of millions, and destroy you. Just because they're Daleks, and they can. Their choice of weaponry may seem a bit dated (Compared to the staff weapons utilised by the Priors, a toilet plunger seems a tad, well, weak), but it proves to be effective none the less. And who doesn't want a ray gun that looks vaguely like a whisk and can kill you in a second shot? Perhaps the most terrifying of all is that, no matter what you do, they can find a way to come back. The number of times the Daleks have been wiped out entirely is quite enormous, but with each series that passes, you can't help but feel they're still out there, waiting to have another crack at our meagre little planet.
To put it bluntly, the Daleks are a race to be reckoned with. They're disaffected war mutants with no sense of right or wrong encased in a flying, semi-impenetrable death machine that can kill hundreds of people with an energy blast and just never seem to die. If that doesn't qualify them to be in my top few fictional Science Fiction villains, I'm not quite sure what does. They are the same villains that have had children cowering behind the furniture for generations, and surely will do likewise for generations more. With the reputation and legacy that the Daleks hold, it doesn't matter that they kill you with a plunger. They could kill you with tissues and still have you soiling those new jeans you just bought.
Thirdly comes a species you've probably never heard of. From the, frankly amazing, American series, The X-Files, comes the Black Oil, which is of a very ambitious design. Black Oil is a form of virus. Only it's a liquid. Only it's sentient. Only it's, like most species, trying to take over the world. It's a living life force, so to speak. Despite having the texture of Crude Oil, it soaks itself into the flesh of humans (or any other unsuspecting race), and begins to pool inside the victim's brain, until the Oil takes over the mind of the poor bugger. But there's another trick to this unique little form of life. The 'virus' also contains the full genetic structure of an alien race. Only they're not alien, because they inhabitated the planet before we did. I know, this is confusing me too. So what it does is starts to assemble this 'alien' race within our bodies, eventually causing us to throw up the alien, killing the host in the process. It's all pretty complex. The problem is that the Government are secretly working with this villainous, uh, thing. Because we all love Government conspiracies with our dose of alien. So we're going along with them, but, no - we're actually double crossing them by developing a vaccine to this 'virus', whilst leading them to believe we're willing to surrender ourselves as a slave to the 'virus' so it can kill us all whilst repopulating the planet with it's original inhabitants, the 'aliens'. Though technically the virus isn't a virus, and the alien isn't alien.
I'd give a nicely detailed summary of what threat they pose, but my head is starting to hurt. All you really need to know is that the vaccine against this 'virus' is very, very hard to create, our government are foolishly using the entire planetery population as bait in some kind of weird deal with this liquidy, virusy, alieny thing, and the Black Oil virus could be lurking anywhere, ready to start taking over the population. Not good. They can hibernate for millennia, and could be lurking anywhere - which is their major advantage in all of this.
Finally comes our fourth race, and is again a tad more recognisable. Well, I say 'race', but it's not strictly a species. It's actually an artificial intelligence called SkyNet, which was initially designed to protect the world, but gets a bit too big for its virtual boots. Anyhow, they exist in the far future, and have the brilliant ability to create an unstoppable android killing machine and send it back to our time to beat the hell out of us all. In fact, it's not just one. They can create as many as they like. I'm sure we're all familiar with this android. It's the Terminator, famously depicted by Arnold Schwarzanegger. The reason SkyNet is evil is because we were stupid enough to allow it to gain sentience, at which point it decided the best way to protect humanity was to end it. Silly machine. Anyhow, the plot gets very twisty and turny throughout the entire franchise, but the driving force behind the inclusion of SkyNet and it's creations remains the same. It creates unstoppable robots and sends them through time. You want to talk about great Science Fiction villains? Ho-ly shit.
So, basically, SkyNet is an out of control, Sentient Artificial Intelligence which doesn't take kindly to mankind's refusal to just die. That's a credible villain in its own right. But when you introduce it's Terminator offspring, you have a villain worthy of making any list. The idea of out of control computers has been done to death, both before and after the creation of this franchise, but the Terminator franchise took it to a whole new level. When you think of killer robots and evil machines, you think Terminator, end of.
So there we have it. 4 Villainous Alien Races, none of which are all that fond of humanity. So, back to the initial point. Who would win, if these 4 champions of Science Fiction got in a scrap. Let's look at it logically, and see what each side brings to the intergalactic table. The Ori live on a higher plane of existence, and give their misguided but awesome-looking Prior mercenaries powers both technological and supernatural in order to spread the word of their fabricated religion, Origin, around the entire Universe. Being from a higher plane of existence, they instantly have the upper hand. I mean, they conquered pretty much every technology in existence before ascending, making them pretty damn impressive. But since their ascension, their ability to influence our own realm relies upon them drawing power from our worship of them. So they have a weakness.
The Daleks kill people, not distinguishing whether their victims are fooled into worshipping the Ori or not. That's not going to please our all-powerful masters, The Ori, who would likely respond by sending waves of Priors to attack. The Daleks can kill with a single shot, and can respond in numbers equal or greater to that of the Priors. However, the Priors possess supernatural abilities which may - MAY - be enough to vanquish the threat of the Daleks. And if that happened, it would only strengthen The Ori and their Priors further - by saving the planet from Daleks, they would have a strong stance for being revered, which strengthens the Ori. But then we have The Black Oil. The question would be, could beings possessed by the Black Oil, or the Aliens they inadvertently give gruesome birth to, be fooled into worshipping The Ori? I'd say it's possible. It could really go either way. But if they didn't, then they'd only end up at war with The Ori. Now, the Black Oil 'virus' could potentially infect Priors too. Presumably, they are not immune to it, although it is possible The Ori could bestow upon them the ability to rid themselves of it. Again, it's hard to judge. Personally, I favour the Ori's chances over the Black Oil. But, if a war with the Daleks had already depleted the number of Priors, the sudden surprise of a sentient virus that can attack from anywhere might overthrow the Priors, leaving The Ori no way of spreading the word of Origin - leaving them powerless.
Then we have time travelling robots coming to kill us all. By now, at least by my reckoning, The Daleks have lost. Not totally, but they have sustained enough losses to have retreated to regroup. That leaves either The Ori or the Oil. If The Ori are in charge, we're in for one hell of a battle between the ultimate in technology, and the ultimate in the supernatural. If it's the Oil 'virus', I predict a strong victory for the Terminators (They'd need more than one, in any case). Being androids, I see no way for the 'virus' to infect them, and the aliens created by the 'virus' would probably fare little better against the genocidal robots than un-armed humans would. Which isn't all that well. Also, assuming a battle between the returning Dalek forces and the Terminators, I predict a Terminator victory. They're both pretty unstoppable, but the Terminators more so than the Daleks - whose weaponry typically relies on them being at war with foes with at least some element of organicity to them.
So, what I've established in my own mind by now, is that the two main contenders here are The Ori and The Terminators. The Supernatural, Superevolved, Superfreaky, Ascended Wannabe-Gods against a horde of near-invincible, incredibly strong, and incredibly intelligent robots. That's a fight I'd pay to see. But, who could possibly win, and what would swing it in their favour?
Well, to me, the answer is simple. The winning element extends far beyond our own planet. It depends on how much strength the Ori sap. The Terminators, who would be fairly evenly matched against the Priors and their highly evolved supernatural ability, would have to start destroying Ori followers. The more Ori followers they kill, the weaker the Ori get. They'd need to find a way to travel to other planets, presumably by taking the Stargate or something, and start wiping out believers. The Ori, likewise, would want to protect their followers, whilst converting more. So it becomes a war of attrition. The Priors of the Ori are givenly godly powers which stands them in good stead against the Terminators, but likewise the Terminators will prove difficult to destroy and, being computerised, won't fall into the religious trap of the Ori.
It's hard to predict an outcome, but I'd have to give the slight edge to the Ori, purely for their nature as would-be Gods. What circumstances could ever lead to such an encounter, we'll never know (hopefully!), but we can be certain of one thing. No matter who wins, mankind is pretty much doomed. I'm sure you'll all sleep easy tonight.
Disagree with my predicted outcome? Feel I failed to mention the true masters of Science Fiction? Let us know!
On Sunday, you may have seen my post Who > Hood > Merlin, in which I told you that Merlin was a pile of lovable nonsense, though not up to the standards of Doctor Who or even Robin Hood. But I must confess that the Saturday episode - airing the day before my post - was actually substantially different.
Merlin, looking ridiculously airbrushed
It was fantastic. The best episode Merlin has had yet, far better than the inexcusably rubbish "The Gates Of Avalon". It revolved - like many a Merlin episode - around a new person wandering into Camelot. Was it an evil peddler of medicines? Not this time. A witch in disguise? Oh, so cliché! No, it's a young boy. Of course, there's a twist. He's magic!
So, obviously, Merlin takes care of him...and the rest of plot is fairly standard. It did manage to be the most inventive episode yet with its plot because of the twist - the boy was Mordred. This twist, however, has a major downside - it is only as effective as it should be if you know who Mordred is. (He's a guy who will later fight, and mortally wound, Arthur.) Of course, John Hurt The Exposition Dragon will warn Merlin, but equally obvious, Merlin won't listen.
A nice twist, especially as the malevolent evil is just a young, innocent Druid boy who is being persecuted - and actually with justification. An interesting concept for a kid's show, as anyone will agree. If Merlin could do more clever scripts like this, with fewer obscenely awful CGI dragons, then it might hit at least Robin Hood's standards. Go, BBC drama people, make it so.
Will this Saturday's episode, then, be of such high quality as Mordred's appearance? Here's Wikipedia's plot summary:
The machinations of Nimueh begin anew as a mysterious knight arrives in Camelot whilst a ceremony happens of Arthur's coming of age, and it soon uncovers Uther's secret past.
What's this? A stranger in Camelot? Well, well, we didn't expect that one at all. It's not become the most common plot element in all of Merlin, bar trips to the dragon's cave set. However, more development on the Nimueh arc may end up being very good, and the episode is teasingly titled "Excalibur".
As long as the Excalibur myth doesn't end up being as laughable as the way Bonekickers handled it, I'll be happy.
That's it for your weekly Merlin fix from The Three Rs.
As it's well documented on this website that I am a costumer of Virgin Media. I've been both positive and negative about the company in the past, but here's a topic why most people seem to think Virgin Media equals a negative.
In March 2007 it was plastered everywhere, in billboards, bus and internet adverts from Sky, that Virgin Media were to drop the Sky Basic Channels due to pricing issues*, which included Sky1 and Sky News. From there all hell broke lose!
"I'm Leaving!" "Virgin suck coz you cant watch Lost" "SKy has Sky Sport so it Must bee beter." etc.
Well only 50,000 people left to Sky Digital so basically nothing happened. Peanuts. What made the removal of the channels a real pain in the backside for everyone was the constant "When iz teh sky chanels comeing bak?" on forums. Look. If you really care, you'd leave. So basically you are just trolling... Welcome to the pissing internet.
Anyway, jump forward in time to today and the news is that the Sky Channels are on their way back. Come November 13th, you'll be able to watch Sky 1, 2 and 3, Sky News, Sky Sports News, Sky Arts 1 and 2 and Sky Real Lives 1 and 2 on both Sky Digital and Virgin Media. Hurrah, forums are about to become a clean area, but we all know they will be replaced with where's Sky1 HD?
Anyway the best news is the return of the channels in time for some Christmas Terry Pratchett adaptation. (Sarcasm.)
Ciao!
*Transcript of the Event:
Sky: MURDOCH WANT MORE!
Virgin: We're to poor to pay! We're in a huge sum of debt!
Sky: OK, what about we give the channels a higher price tag and you dig deeper...
After watching careerless celebrities jump through polystyrene in silver lycra under the ever-too-watchful eye of Dale Winton, what more could you want than a bit of escapism involving knights, wizards and Richard Wilson? It's such a winning formula, moreso than having Robin Hood deal with post tramautic stress disorder and slavery. Throw a massive dragon with the voice of John Hurt into the mix and then you've just got to tune in, right?
It was hard not to be excited about Merlin - unless you're over the age of 10. But even then, you relax and know that they can't have murdered the legend like they did with Robin Hood two years ago. Well, you're in for a bit of a shock if you're after the classic Arthurian tale. To keep in touch with today's "yoof", Merlin is now any old angsty teen (without the capability to blog about life) and Arthur is your typical showoff teenager, constantly lusting after whoever takes his fancy this week. This, actually, isn't such a bad idea - it's an easy way to reinvigorate that same old story. It worked for Smallville, after all.
The story is thus: Merlin is sent to Camelot by his mum, where he meets court physician Gaius (Richard "I Don't Belieeeeve It" Wilson). Quickly, Gaius realises Merlin is magical. This is a big problem - Camelot's King Uther Pendragon (Arthur's dad) has banned all forms of magic from Camelot. So Merlin's got to "keep the magic secret", as the show's tagline goes.
Uther, Arthur, Merlin, Gaius, Morgana and Guinevere
Of course, this is not going to be easy when Camelot comes up against some sort of problem every week that involves magic. That is very much the show's format: trouble comes, Merlin can solve it, Gaius says he shouldn't, it all goes wrong, Merlin steps in secretly. Now, there's nothing wrong with a formulaic show - Doctor Who just goes to a different place every week and fights an alien, right? - but formulaic shows need one thing: variance. You can repeat the basics over and over, so long as the mystical problem is different each week. But Merlin just isn't trying. As if all the writers have had good ideas, without telling each other - leading to very similar plotlines. We're about halfway through the current series of Merlin, and most of the episodes have focused on a mysterious illness of sorts, or a stranger coming to Camelot and turning out to be not very nice. Sometimes it's both together. It gets repetitive quite quickly.
One saving grace of the episodes is some sort of apparent arc, featuring evil witch Nimueh. She's clearly got history with Uther, and is trying to get her hands on Merlin. This story arc gives Merlin a bit more depth, depth that it needs to attract a consistent audience and be appreciated by older viewers. However, Nimueh popped up in episode three, then four, then vanished for a bit. The episode arrangement is askew, and as there's no continuity, episodes two and three - at least - could have been swapped around.
It seems that these days narration is the flavour of the month on television. Sarah Connor chronicles her life by bookending episodes with monologues (dropped in Series 2, though), while Heroes insists on its Mohinderlogues (though these too seem to disappearing). What does Merlin give you? A massive dragon! It's voiced by John Hurt to boot. However, the dragon is so painfully computer-generated that it doesn't look stunning at all. It just looks very average. Beautiful vistas, little touch-ups and a handful of other situations are where CGI shines. Dragons, not so much. It also doesn't make sense. Uther, vehemently against magic, kills all but one dragon, who he chains up in a massive cave. I'm surprised Merlin turns up for a little chat with the dragon all the time, too - it only speaks in riddles and talks about destiny. The dragon is one giant expositionary device. And not even decent to look at!
"Ah, young wizard! My first is in windmill, but not in canoe..."
The other characters, the ones played by real actors, are slight improvements. Acting is up to the usual standard of BBC Saturday drama, but there's one character who puzzles me infinitely. Uther. Played by Anthony Head, who's also been in Who, fact fans, I'm not sure how the writers want me to react to him. Consequently, I have no idea either. Is he a villain? Well not really...all his anti-magic attitude is clearly linked to his past. But, at the same time, he's no hero - he just jumps around being a bit of a pain.
For all its flaws, Merlin has at least one thing going for it. It's fun. It's light entertainment. Dump all hopes of a proper drama, and just set your brain to relax mode. It's got spots of humour - sometimes funny - and enough plot to keep you watching for the full 45 minutes. True, you'll have to overlook the plot holes and the absolutely dire rubber snake heads. However, when you get into the mood for some light-hearted, cheesy, fun television, Merlin is there for you. Unlike Doctor Who, it is not a wonderful concept wonderfully produced. Unlike Robin Hood, you don't get modern subtexts implanted into a familiar context. But, like Hole In The Wall that preceeds it, it's Saturday night telly as you want it: a bit rubbish, in a fun way.
I was rummaging through articles while I found this interesting article. It seems quite interesting to me, after reading it.
Men like blond bombshells (and women want to look like them)
Long before TV—in 15th- and 16th- century Italy, and possibly two millennia ago—women were dying their hair blond. A recent study shows that in Iran, where exposure to Western media and culture is limited, women are actually more concerned with their body image, and want to lose more weight, than their American counterparts. It is difficult to ascribe the preferences and desires of women in 15th-century Italy and 21st-century Iran to socialization by media.
Women's desire to look like Barbie—young with small waist, large breasts, long blond hair, and blue eyes—is a direct, realistic, and sensible response to the desire of men to mate with women who look like her. There is evolutionary logic behind each of these features.
Men prefer young women in part because they tend to be healthier than older women. One accurate indicator of health is physical attractiveness; another is hair. Healthy women have lustrous, shiny hair, whereas the hair of sickly people loses its luster. Because hair grows slowly, shoulder-length hair reveals several years of a woman's health status.
Men also have a universal preference for women with a low waist-to-hip ratio. They are healthier and more fertile than other women; they have an easier time conceiving a child and do so at earlier ages because they have larger amounts of essential reproductive hormones. Thus men are unconsciously seeking healthier and more fertile women when they seek women with small waists.
Until very recently, it was a mystery to evolutionary psychology why men prefer women with large breasts, since the size of a woman's breasts has no relationship to her ability to lactate. But Harvard anthropologist Frank Marlowe contends that larger, and hence heavier, breasts sag more conspicuously with age than do smaller breasts. Thus they make it easier for men to judge a woman's age (and her reproductive value) by sight—suggesting why men find women with large breasts more attractive.
Alternatively, men may prefer women with large breasts for the same reason they prefer women with small waists. A new study of Polish women shows that women with large breasts and tight waists have the greatest fecundity, indicated by their levels of two reproductive hormones (estradiol and progesterone).
Blond hair is unique in that it changes dramatically with age. Typically, young girls with light blond hair become women with brown hair. Thus, men who prefer to mate with blond women are unconsciously attempting to mate with younger (and hence, on average, healthier and more fecund) women. It is no coincidence that blond hair evolved in Scandinavia and northern Europe, probably as an alternative means for women to advertise their youth, as their bodies were concealed under heavy clothing.
Women with blue eyes should not be any different from those with green or brown eyes. Yet preference for blue eyes seems both universal and undeniable—in males as well as females. One explanation is that the human pupil dilates when an individual is exposed to something that she likes. For instance, the pupils of women and infants (but not men) spontaneously dilate when they see babies. Pupil dilation is an honest indicator of interest and attraction. And the size of the pupil is easiest to determine in blue eyes. Blue-eyed people are considered attractive as potential mates because it is easiest to determine whether they are interested in us or not.
The irony is that none of the above is true any longer. Through face-lifts, wigs, liposuction, surgical breast augmentation, hair dye, and color contact lenses, any woman, regardless of age, can have many of the key features that define ideal female beauty. And men fall for them. Men can cognitively understand that many blond women with firm, large breasts are not actually 15 years old, but they still find them attractive because their evolved psychological mechanisms are fooled by modern inventions that did not exist in the ancestral environment.
Humans are naturally polygamous
The history of western civilization aside, humans are naturally polygamous. Polyandry (a marriage of one woman to many men) is very rare, but polygyny (the marriage of one man to many women) is widely practiced in human societies, even though Judeo-Christian traditions hold that monogamy is the only natural form of marriage. We know that humans have been polygynous throughout most of history because men are taller than women.
Among primate and nonprimate species, the degree of polygyny highly correlates with the degree to which males of a species are larger than females. The more polygynous the species, the greater the size disparity between the sexes. Typically, human males are 10 percent taller and 20 percent heavier than females. This suggests that, throughout history, humans have been mildly polygynous.
Relative to monogamy, polygyny creates greater fitness variance (the distance between the "winners" and the "losers" in the reproductive game) among males than among females because it allows a few males to monopolize all the females in the group. The greater fitness variance among males creates greater pressure for men to compete with each other for mates. Only big and tall males can win mating opportunities. Among pair-bonding species like humans, in which males and females stay together to raise their children, females also prefer to mate with big and tall males because they can provide better physical protection against predators and other males.
In societies where rich men are much richer than poor men, women (and their children) are better off sharing the few wealthy men; one-half, one-quarter, or even one-tenth of a wealthy man is still better than an entire poor man. As George Bernard Shaw puts it, "The maternal instinct leads a woman to prefer a tenth share in a first-rate man to the exclusive possession of a third-rate one." Despite the fact that humans are naturally polygynous, most industrial societies are monogamous because men tend to be more or less equal in their resources compared with their ancestors in medieval times. (Inequality tends to increase as society advances in complexity from hunter-gatherer to advanced agrarian societies. Industrialization tends to decrease the level of inequality.)
Most women benefit from polygyny, while most men benefit from monogamy
When there is resource inequality among men—the case in every human society—most women benefit from polygyny: women can share a wealthy man. Under monogamy, they are stuck with marrying a poorer man.
The only exceptions are extremely desirable women. Under monogamy, they can monopolize the wealthiest men; under polygyny, they must share the men with other, less desirable women. However, the situation is exactly opposite for men. Monogamy guarantees that every man can find a wife. True, less desirable men can marry only less desirable women, but that's much better than not marrying anyone at all.
Men in monogamous societies imagine they would be better off under polygyny. What they don't realize is that, for most men who are not extremely desirable, polygyny means no wife at all, or, if they are lucky, a wife who is much less desirable than one they could get under monogamy.
Most suicide bombers are Muslim
According to the Oxford University sociologist Diego Gambetta, editor of Making Sense of Suicide Missions, a comprehensive history of this troubling yet topical phenomenon, while suicide missions are not always religiously motivated, when religion is involved, it is always Muslim. Why is this? Why is Islam the only religion that motivates its followers to commit suicide missions?
The surprising answer from the evolutionary psychological perspective is that Muslim suicide bombing may have nothing to do with Islam or the Koran (except for two lines in it). It may have nothing to do with the religion, politics, the culture, the race, the ethnicity, the language, or the region. As with everything else from this perspective, it may have a lot to do with sex, or, in this case, the absence of sex.
What distinguishes Islam from other major religions is that it tolerates polygyny. By allowing some men to monopolize all women and altogether excluding many men from reproductive opportunities, polygyny creates shortages of available women. If 50 percent of men have two wives each, then the other 50 percent don't get any wives at all.
So polygyny increases competitive pressure on men, especially young men of low status. It therefore increases the likelihood that young men resort to violent means to gain access to mates. By doing so, they have little to lose and much to gain compared with men who already have wives. Across all societies, polygyny makes men violent, increasing crimes such as murder and rape, even after controlling for such obvious factors as economic development, economic inequality, population density, the level of democracy, and political factors in the region.
However, polygyny itself is not a sufficient cause of suicide bombing. Societies in sub-Saharan Africa and the Caribbean are much more polygynous than the Muslim nations in the Middle East and North Africa. And they do have very high levels of violence. Sub-Saharan Africa suffers from a long history of continuous civil wars—but not suicide bombings.
The other key ingredient is the promise of 72 virgins waiting in heaven for any martyr in Islam. The prospect of exclusive access to virgins may not be so appealing to anyone who has even one mate on earth, which strict monogamy virtually guarantees. However, the prospect is quite appealing to anyone who faces the bleak reality on earth of being a complete reproductive loser.
It is the combination of polygyny and the promise of a large harem of virgins in heaven that motivates many young Muslim men to commit suicide bombings. Consistent with this explanation, all studies of suicide bombers indicate that they are significantly younger than not only the Muslim population in general but other (nonsuicidal) members of their own extreme political organizations like Hamas and Hezbollah. And nearly all suicide bombers are single.
Having sons reduces the likelihood of divorce
Sociologists and demographers have discovered that couples who have at least one son face significantly less risk of divorce than couples who have only daughters. Why is this?
Since a man's mate value is largely determined by his wealth, status, and power—whereas a woman's is largely determined by her youth and physical attractiveness—the father has to make sure that his son will inherit his wealth, status, and power, regardless of how much or how little of these resources he has. In contrast, there is relatively little that a father (or mother) can do to keep a daughter youthful or make her more physically attractive.
The continued presence of (and investment by) the father is therefore important for the son, but not as crucial for the daughter. The presence of sons thus deters divorce and departure of the father from the family more than the presence of daughters, and this effect tends to be stronger among wealthy families.
Beautiful people have more daughters
It is commonly believed that whether parents conceive a boy or a girl is up to random chance. Close, but not quite; it is largely up to chance. The normal sex ratio at birth is 105 boys for every 100 girls. But the sex ratio varies slightly in different circumstances and for different families. There are factors that subtly influence the sex of an offspring.
One of the most celebrated principles in evolutionary biology, the Trivers-Willard hypothesis, states that wealthy parents of high status have more sons, while poor parents of low status have more daughters. This is because children generally inherit the wealth and social status of their parents. Throughout history, sons from wealthy families who would themselves become wealthy could expect to have a large number of wives, mistresses and concubines, and produce dozens or hundreds of children, whereas their equally wealthy sisters can have only so many children. So natural selection designs parents to have biased sex ratio at birth depending upon their economic circumstances—more boys if they are wealthy, more girls if they are poor. (The biological mechanism by which this occurs is not yet understood.)
This hypothesis has been documented around the globe. American presidents, vice presidents, and cabinet secretaries have more sons than daughters. Poor Mukogodo herders in East Africa have more daughters than sons. Church parish records from the 17th and 18th centuries show that wealthy landowners in Leezen, Germany, had more sons than daughters, while farm laborers and tradesmen without property had more daughters than sons. In a survey of respondents from 46 nations, wealthy individuals are more likely to indicate a preference for sons if they could only have one child, whereas less wealthy individuals are more likely to indicate a preference for daughters.
The generalized Trivers-Willard hypothesis goes beyond a family's wealth and status: If parents have any traits that they can pass on to their children and that are better for sons than for daughters, then they will have more boys. Conversely, if parents have any traits that they can pass on to their children and that are better for daughters, they will have more girls.
Physical attractiveness, while a universally positive quality, contributes even more to women's reproductive success than to men's. The generalized hypothesis would therefore predict that physically attractive parents should have more daughters than sons. Once again, this is the case. Americans who are rated "very attractive" have a 56 percent chance of having a daughter for their first child, compared with 48 percent for everyone else.
What Bill Gates and Paul McCartney have in common with criminals
For nearly a quarter of a century, criminologists have known about the "age-crime curve." In every society at all historical times, the tendency to commit crimes and other risk-taking behavior rapidly increases in early adolescence, peaks in late adolescence and early adulthood, rapidly decreases throughout the 20s and 30s, and levels off in middle age.
This curve is not limited to crime. The same age profile characterizes every quantifiable human behavior that is public (i.e., perceived by many potential mates) and costly (i.e., not affordable by all sexual competitors). The relationship between age and productivity among male jazz musicians, male painters, male writers, and male scientists—which might be called the "age-genius curve"—is essentially the same as the age-crime curve. Their productivity—the expressions of their genius—quickly peaks in early adulthood, and then equally quickly declines throughout adulthood. The age-genius curve among their female counterparts is much less pronounced; it does not peak or vary as much as a function of age.
Paul McCartney has not written a hit song in years, and now spends much of his time painting. Bill Gates is now a respectable businessman and philanthropist, and is no longer a computer whiz kid. J.D. Salinger now lives as a total recluse and has not published anything in more than three decades. Orson Welles was a mere 26 when he wrote, produced, directed, and starred in Citizen Kane.
A single theory can explain the productivity of both creative geniuses and criminals over the life course: Both crime and genius are expressions of young men's competitive desires, whose ultimate function in the ancestral environment would have been to increase reproductive success.
In the physical competition for mates, those who are competitive may act violently toward their male rivals. Men who are less inclined toward crime and violence may express their competitiveness through their creative activities.
The cost of competition, however, rises dramatically when a man has children, when his energies and resources are put to better use protecting and investing in them. The birth of the first child usually occurs several years after puberty because men need some time to accumulate sufficient resources and attain sufficient status to attract their first mate. There is therefore a gap of several years between the rapid rise in the benefits of competition and similarly rapid rise in its costs. Productivity rapidly declines in late adulthood as the costs of competition rise and cancel its benefits.
These calculations have been performed by natural and sexual selection, so to speak, which then equips male brains with a psychological mechanism to incline them to be increasingly competitive immediately after puberty and make them less competitive right after the birth of their first child. Men simply do not feel like acting violently, stealing, or conducting additional scientific experiments, or they just want to settle down after the birth of their child but they do not know exactly why.
The similarity between Bill Gates, Paul McCartney, and criminals—in fact, among all men throughout evolutionary history—points to an important concept in evolutionary biology: female choice.
Women often say no to men. Men have had to conquer foreign lands, win battles and wars, compose symphonies, author books, write sonnets, paint cathedral ceilings, make scientific discoveries, play in rock bands, and write new computer software in order to impress women so that they will agree to have sex with them. Men have built (and destroyed) civilization in order to impress women, so that they might say yes.
The midlife crisis is a myth—sort of
Many believe that men go through a midlife crisis when they are in middle age. Not quite. Many middle-aged men do go through midlife crises, but it's not because they are middle-aged. It's because their wives are. From the evolutionary psychological perspective, a man's midlife crisis is precipitated by his wife's imminent menopause and end of her reproductive career, and thus his renewed need to attract younger women. Accordingly, a 50-year-old man married to a 25-year-old woman would not go through a midlife crisis, while a 25-year-old man married to a 50-year-old woman would, just like a more typical 50-year-old man married to a 50-year-old woman. It's not his midlife that matters; it's hers. When he buys a shiny-red sports car, he's not trying to regain his youth; he's trying to attract young women to replace his menopausal wife by trumpeting his flash and cash.
It's natural for politicians to risk everything for an affair (but only if they're male)
On the morning of January 21, 1998, as Americans woke up to the stunning allegation that President Bill Clinton had had an affair with a 24-year-old White House intern, Darwinian historian Laura L. Betzig thought, "I told you so." Betzig points out that while powerful men throughout Western history have married monogamously (only one legal wife at a time), they have always mated polygynously (they had lovers, concubines, and female slaves). With their wives, they produced legitimate heirs; with the others, they produced bastards. Genes make no distinction between the two categories of children.
As a result, powerful men of high status throughout human history attained very high reproductive success, leaving a large number of offspring (legitimate and otherwise), while countless poor men died mateless and childless. Moulay Ismail the Bloodthirsty, the last Sharifian emperor of Morocco, stands out quantitatively, having left more offspring—1,042—than anyone else on record, but he was by no means qualitatively different from other powerful men, like Bill Clinton.
The question many asked in 1998—"Why on earth would the most powerful man in the world jeopardize his job for an affair with a young woman?"—is, from a Darwinian perspective, a silly one. Betzig's answer would be: "Why not?" Men strive to attain political power, consciously or unconsciously, in order to have reproductive access to a larger number of women. Reproductive access to women is the goal, political office but one means. To ask why the President of the United States would have a sexual encounter with a young woman is like asking why someone who worked very hard to earn a large sum of money would then spend it.
What distinguishes Bill Clinton is not that he had extramarital affairs while in office—others have, more will; it would be a Darwinian puzzle if they did not—what distinguishes him is the fact that he got caught.
Men sexually harass women because they are not sexist
An unfortunate consequence of the ever-growing number of women joining the labor force and working side by side with men is the increasing number of sexual harassment cases. Why must sexual harassment be a necessary consequence of the sexual integration of the workplace?
Psychologist Kingsley R. Browne identifies two types of sexual harassment cases: the quid pro quo ("You must sleep with me if you want to keep your job or be promoted") and the "hostile environment" (the workplace is deemed too sexualized for workers to feel safe and comfortable). While feminists and social scientists tend to explain sexual harassment in terms of "patriarchy" and other ideologies, Browne locates the ultimate cause of both types of sexual harassment in sex differences in mating strategies.
Studies demonstrate unequivocally that men are far more interested in short-term casual sex (one-night stand) than women. In one now-classic study, 75 percent of undergraduate men approached by an attractive female stranger agreed to have sex with her; none of the women approached by an attractive male stranger did. Many men who would not date the stranger nonetheless agreed to have sex with her.
The quid pro quo types of harassment are manifestations of men's greater desire for short-term casual sex and their willingness to use any available means to achieve that goal. Feminists often claim that sexual harassment is "not about sex but about power;" Browne contends it is both—men using power to get sex. "To say that it is only about power makes no more sense than saying that bank robbery is only about guns, not about money."
Sexual harassment cases of the hostile-environment variety result from sex differences in what men and women perceive as "overly sexual" or "hostile" behavior. Many women legitimately complain that they have been subjected to abusive, intimidating, and degrading treatment by their male coworkers. Browne points out that long before women entered the labor force, men subjected each other to such abusive, intimidating, and degrading treatment.
Abuse, intimidation, and degradation are all part of men's repertoire of tactics employed in competitive situations. In other words, men are not treating women differently from men—the definition of discrimination, under which sexual harassment legally falls—but the opposite: Men harass women precisely because they are not discriminating between men and women.
I'm not really sure if it's through, but after reading that psychology article really made me think that the infomation was more or less - true. I hope that everyone had a nice time reading that - and we might have different opinions from the infomation. Took almost half an hour writing this article, whew. It seems long o.o
Written by: Melaisis/Jesus2nd/Some Kid From Sheffield
Two guys in a plane, flying over the desert. Plane gets shot down. Walking around the desert for a few days with a distinct lack of food and water. They begin to see things. On the horizon, one of them spot a tree made out of bacon and decides to run towards it. Just as he reaches the tree, he gets shot down. Confused, the other guy runs towards the tree in hope of receiving his meaty tree-t. He also gets shot down, bang bang bang*. In their dying moments, one turns to the other and murmurs:
Due to the success of my 'How To Be A WoW Zombie', I came up with this little narrative of a recent questline me and a friend completed.
Legends tell of a great sea beast that lives in Dustwallow Marsh, on the coast of Kalimdor. Many had seen this creature, with its Devil's stare, mysteriously high level and shared model with The Lurker Below, but few survived such encounters. I've had an obsession with large beasts of the deep for quite a while so armed with a ferocious attitude and an adventuring buddy I set out to try and catch a glimpse of the mighty monster.
I began my epic journey in Menethil. Deor - my Paladin friend - was busy in some remote location and had agreed to meet me in Theramore, so I simply flew up to the Wetlands and spent a few minutes waiting at the southern dock for my transport to arrive. It was a long but pleasant journey over the high seas.
It was dusk by the time I arrived in port and I had to wait a few minutes before my friend arrived. In the meantime, I was harassed by some deserters of the town's navy but managed to find the shift's guard captain, who offered some vague advice about what we were looking for.
She told me to head over to the lighthouse and talk to the hilariously-named Babs Fizzletorque about getting the light back in working order. Now, its beyond me why Dustwallow Marsh requires a lighthouse to aid shipping, as there's no rocks in the water nearby. Moreover, why is Babs the only Gnome in the port? A conspiracy, I say!
Once at the lighthouse, the Gnome told me that they needed oil to get the beacon at the top of the tower working again! Well never! Now, you'd think that being part of one of the most technologically advanced races in Azeroth would mean that Babs had instant access to such basic engineering materials and would merely send me to pick them up, but no! Instead, she sent me under the bay to kill mini sea monsters and gain their oil. Threshers don't even use oil in their attacks!
Bah, whatever. After getting my delicate dress tunic obscenely wet, I gave the required oil to Babs, who merely assured me she'd put it to good use. Well cheers lovey, but I expect to see results now! anyway, as a 'reward' she gave me and my companion a copy of an old book she'd found up in the tower. Well, two copies really, since we were both on the quest. It was called 'Dastardly Denizens of the Deep' and made some reference to Tethyr. I skimmed through the pages before shoving it in the face of 'Dirty' Michael Crowe.
'Iya Mikey! Why do they call you 'Dirty'? What, its only because you deal in fish!? You mean its not got anything to do with touching children?! No, I don't want to go see Nat Pagle. Yes I believe in Tethyr. I believe! PUT THAT HADDOCK AWAY!
So, the crazy fish trader sent us to find the legendary fisherman Nat Pagle, who resided on the set of small islands south of Theramore. I tell you, being out there for so long must have made him go a bit crazy. Next thing me and Deor knew, he was smothering us in fish paste and sending us over to a nearby shipwreck.
Once there, some arsehole shark attacked us both and I went back to Nat to complain. As it turns out, this had been his intentional all along. I didn't appreciate being the tester for his new bait, but he gave us some cheap beer and confirmed the stories of Tethyr. As it happens, the reason why they shut down the lighthouse was because the monster was fond of bright lights. What is this, a Matchbox Twenty song!?
'C'mon Deor, let's swim back to Theramore and kill Tethyr!' 'Can't we Hearthstone and then get the portal to Darnassus and then fly back!?' '...You're so lazy.'
A few hours minutes later we were back on the docks of Theramore, talking to Major Millis about bringing the beast to bare. For no apparent reason, the bloke agreed and the lighthouse was magically switched on.
It suddenly got awfully dark and a few marksmen appeared on the pier. Apparently the monster was approaching, yikes!
Look out Billy! We've caught ourselves a big 'un!
It wasn't long before Tethyr was blowing the archers off of the docks. I had to move quickly and Deor suggested we make use of the mortars that had been set up around the area. I was about to pull the whole 'Health and Safety first!' rant on him, but the cheeky bugger was already firing at the monster!
Just as well, too; check out the size of that water beam! The next few minutes passed in a flash, but I do recall the over-use of the phrase 'FIRE IN THE HOLE!' and similar expressions. Since me and Deor were working at the same time using extremely over-powered characters, it wasn't long before Tethyr went belly-up. Quite a shame, really; I could get Catch of the Day with that thing!
Fireworks and clear skies for all! Wait, what!? Why are you giving me greens as a quest reward!? There's no plate, either?! GARRRRRGH!
As many of my town companions will know, I pop into the recently opened Urban Outfitters on a weekly basis to pick up promotional flyers for bands and club events in Leeds. I think the staff have grown to realise I enter their premises purely to hop downstairs and collect these gorgeous pieces of art, but they don't really say anything aside from giving me and my travelling group a few dodgy looks.
Aside from pinning them to walls and making our establishment look prettier, these nice little sparks of creativity also offer up great possibilities of making contact with the local scene and also allows us to recruit upcoming artists. One such aspiring contributor is Tom Newell, formerly of the grand Carol-Anne Showband. Tom assures me that he will update his own bio at some point, which fits perfectly with my own idea of setting up something reminiscent of Gawker Artists for N3twork.
Take a look at some of Tom's great work in the slideshow below:
Hopefully you'll see more of the above style on our own projects as well as the local scene. In the meantime, check out his Photobucket.
So Obama won. I'm sure Reload92 will be happy and will be posting his opinion soon, and we will be spamming it everywhere in a typically crowded area. Oh well.
Since our front page seems to define 'Wall of Text' at the moment, I decided to present 'Batman: The Musical'. Back in the early 90s, a concept came about to produce a not-so-camp Batman musical. It never got to stage, but they managed to record some of the key tracks, presented in his video (the Joker's part is the best).
So. I attended a gig Thursday night (Leeds Stylus) for Does It Offend You, Yeah, and it did indeed offend me...yeah. The support were lacklustre, downbeat snyth pop that was clearly cashing in on the new 'nu rave' trend spreading about. This was confirmed by their cover of Pendulum's 'Blood Sugar', one of the bands who appear to be pretty much heading that particular movement despite totally DnB beginnings (although I do still enjoy the new album). The band themselves were at the beginning engaging, and seemingly happy to finish the end of their tour in style, including such antics as crowd surfing from the guitarist and a wonderfully eccentric performance for the song 'Let's Make Out'. However, as quickly as the enthusiasm had come on, they lost it, the guitarist reduced to a moody, shoegazing and completely indifferent version of his former self as if he were a manic depressive (hope I don't end up eating my words here without research). Additionally, the set list was shorter than the album, and the album was hardly an exercise in extensive compositions, being small bursts of electro tinged blip rock. Yet they could only be bothered to play just more than half the album, also, with the exception of the aforementioned 'Let's Make Out', their (heavy) heart wasn't in it with just slight interludes of very lazy crowd banter from the frontman. It's disappointing, as I expected more energy due to the genre, yet they had none, choosing to instead just pass their last performance quickly and efficiently rather than bow out in a blaze of fan glory. Small credit to them for playing the best songs though. Battle Royale being a particular highlight, was exceptionally good sounding live as was 'Let's Make Out' and 'With A Heavy Heart'.
Hmm, seems they look pretty much apathetic and/or forcibly animated all the time.
Ahh well, misery over, two more positive titbits relating to music...
One being that the mighty Mastodon has emerged from its hibernation, to title their new album, provide the song list (three of which I have heard in demo format and are VERY promising even without any refinement*), announced plans to join Metallica and... announcing that they would be playing European Festival dates. NOW, being based in the UK, this was promising as I was reminded today we are a part of Europe :O. SO, either Leeds Festival (my hopeful first thought) or Download (Dee's more accurate thought) will be hosting them, and from viewing their Workhorse Chronicles DVD I can guarantee their live performance is not to be missed. Seriously I can't big this band up enough for their intelligent and innovative brand of chaos metal, checking them out is immediately encouraged, especially in the midst of such average bands digging up and recycling small melodic hooks and milking them for all their lactose producing worth.
Album Title - Crack The Skye Set List 01. Oblivion 02. Divinations 03. Quintessence 04. The Czar (I) Usurper (II) Escape (III) Martyr (IV) Spiral 05. Ghost of Karelia 06. Crack The Skye 07. The Last Baron Thanks to Ultimate-Guitar for the info.
And thanks to me for this obscure treasure from my hidden chest of 'material'.
And finally, after playing Guitar Hero for the first time in a while, I came across a bonus song called Impulse by An Endless Sporadic. I consequently got hold of their 'Ameliorate EP' I am consequently recommending it It is an amazingly complex yet seamless collection of progressive songs with so many influences you can't help but be impressed. 'Impulse' is a rollercoaster ride through rocks development, starting with a true and tried riff than speeding through thrash, funk and math metal territory as it comes roaring back to its climax. 'Sun of Pearl' is a thought provoking composition full of beautiful cascading melodies, emphasised by the galloping metal undertones giving it a wonderfully atmospheric feel. 'Anything' for me is the cut of the EP. Definitively progressive metal, it starts with a riff than manipulates and develops it in impressive ways drawing from their influences again, building upon the foundations to a pinnacle that all progressive metal bands should admire. Hence the name of the song, showing how they can make anything from a seemingly simple riff. It is on this track as well, that the truly awesome accuracy of the bands rhythm section is shown, the composition played so concisely one wonders if the work was really down to one man or a series of musically programmed androids (one man plays every instrument other than the drums, the other incidentally plays drums). I'd also like to point out within this song there is a small solo that in its scintillating beauty compares with anything the most experienced guitar wizard can pull out. 'The Adventures of Jabubu' finally is a bizarre but beautifully constructed composition that doesn't sound like it should make any sense, with the additions of ecstatic synth, twinkling xylophone and then frenzied palm muting? Huh? It also screams game theme song, perhaps for a Zelda game based upon Link enjoying a particularly funky LSD trip. Its an uncategorisable wonder.
I rate this EP 4.8/5**. The amount of ingenious ideas crammed into each composition is awe inspiring and completely original, despite the belief of many that metal is a genre in the process of recycling music gone before. Its virtually perfect, every single note is calculated and performed with precision. The only reason I won't give it 5/5 is the fact its an EP, and I don't feel right calling it an outright masterpiece if its not an extended LP and a more official output, call me old fashioned, completely unreasonable prick or a bad reviewer, I'm already aware of all three. I view the EP as a sort of confidence booster, an opportunity for them to give us a sample of their music and to provide expectations. If this is to be believed, than their album will be phenomenal, not that I'm going hype it up...or anything...
Perfection was only two or three songs away...
* Contact me for more details on this if you wish ** 0.1 for the fact its not a proper album, another 0.1 because I didn't think 0.1 was enough of a deficit, and I'm awkward.
PS: Completely unrelated, though I have to add this in, entirely agree with Dee's F Zero X review. We bum it.
Firstly, apologies for not posting for some time. Infact I just offhandedly remembered today that I was still meant to write, and ironically was reminded today too as an ultimatum :S I'm not too good with this whole commitment thing. It's not because I don't want to be commited, or don't like it enough (which is often the normal reason for lack of commitment), it's just I'm terrible at it. And remembering things in general for that matter. I swear I would forget all my music lessons each week (I have 2 currently, but I used to have 4 a week) if it wasn't for the fact that they're engraved in my mum's diary and it's a tad hard for me to 'forget' them... And actually, last year I completely forgot that my own birthday was coming up until my friend (who shares the same birthday) was telling me how excited he was during the week following up to it. I'm not trying to make up excuses here, it's just how I am :/ Which you might have noticed by how things drift in and out of my mind, and I still type it all down... yeah, apologies for that too.
I don't really know why I'm so forgetful, or how I still manage to do a million things whilst being forgetful and still not fail. Though being easily distracted may be one of the factors. Whenever I have something to do (whatever it is, be it history coursework or washing the dishes) I will do anything ANYTHING to get out of it. Even to the point of ordering my pens by colour. Well maybe not that, but you get my gist. I have a serious problem, I know.
Procrastinating. Why do I do it? Please do tell me. All I know is that when a task comes near, no matter how easy, I have a strange fear about starting it and not getting it right. And obviously the task has to be completeed some time... like revising for the exam 10mins before it actually starts... and that I am Queen of. Crashing. The adrenaline rush just makes you work/absorb 1123891039x faster than normal just because the deadline is coming too close for comfort. And amazingly, as I said before, I don't fail. Infact I do errr pretty well. So the fact that I know I can still do things really close to the deadline and still do pretty well doesn't help to quit my habit of procrastinating. Which, by the way, I really want to do.
Oh but if you want to learn how to procrastinate/can't find enough distractions I can definitely help out in that department. Top 10 ways of killing time:
1. Get a Myspace. Seriously. The HTML coding/getting your profile to perfection will take you at least a day. Then those bulletin quizzes which I am completeeely addicted to. Gutted to those of you who are my friends on there... And if that doesn't kill enough time, whoring yourself around the site and trying to reach an impossible goal of 21083219381021friends will.
2. Get a Facebook. Similar? Hardly. This involves more looking at what's happening in your friends' lives - otherwise known as 'facebook stalking' than being narcissistic and whore-ish.
3. Text. Anyone. Who cares. As long as they text back... (tip: text people who have unlimited texts, or they're parents pay for their phone bill, cos they won't care what they're texting about. Even if it's about girls aloud lyrics. Not that I've ever texted anyone about girls aloud lyrics...)
4. MSN.... Kind of like texting, but without money spent, so they're more likely to answer you. And quicker too. And there's alwaaays people on msn. And if there aren't get some myspace whores onto your contact list. Quick.
5. Youtube. Ahhh there's so many videos out there. Some more bizzare than others. Teach yourself how to play the guitar, make videos of yourself doing something random, rate other singers, laugh at people making utter fools of themseleves, watch movies.... etc.
6. Wikipedia. Just link from one thing to another. Eg. (one i remember) Big Love (TV show) - Some character on there - Pathalogical Lying - Mental illnesses. Soon you'll absorb alot of useless knowledge in quite a long space of time.
7. Write a story. Or in your diary. Or a song. Just write. And if you think you're a crap writer (like me) just promise yourself that no one will see it, and start writing as you think. Kind of like this....
8. Learn songs, play songs, listen to songs. You can't ever know too much music. Find out new bands that no one's heard of (probably because they're crap) and you're on your way to coolness
9. Play with your pet. You think I'm kidding, but it took me 10mins to get my cat off my leg the other day...
10. This should technically be the best one, but I've actually run out of ideas. Arrange your pens by colour. Err and brand. And test them all out to make sure they work. I did say my ideas were lacking...
PS. The above piece of writing would fall under my definition of crashing (written in 20mins or so oh yeaaah) ... hence why it probably doesn't make too much sense!
I'll try to be a bit more on time next week, and hopefully it won't be as bad.... But knowing me, that's not going to happen.
As you may have read yesterday, this month's Poll is being hosted at The Long Distance Forums. The question is something that must effect you... PC or Mac?
Coinciding with the local stock market plunge and a jump in the jobless rate in Taiwan, local animal rescuers say more and more dogs are being abandoned as owners look for ways to cut expenses. Identifying the problem, the authorities in the Capital of Taipei are keeping track of those dogs and their owners in a bid to prevent abandonment.
Tung Kuan-fu, chief executive of the Taiwan Life Caring and Animal Rescue Organization, said his group has seen a marked increase in the number of dogs it has treated since the downturn began, especially larger breeds. In the last three months, the Taiwan Life Caring and Animal Rescue Organization has rescued about thirty large-sized stray dogs, including Old English sheepdogs and golden retrievers, compared to the number ten in the previous three months.
Large dogs and perhaps, other animals are tend to be thrown away during slowing economy and financial crisis, because those animals are burdens to their owners. In a month, the owners can save $152-$303 by abandoning those poor dogs.
Taiwan has been hit hard by the global financial crisis, with the local stock index plummeting 46 percent from its peak in May and the unemployment jumping to 4.27 percent in September, high for Taiwan.
Chen Wen-mei, a 44-year-old Buddhist follower who runs a private shelter in the Taipei suburb of Linkou, said many Taiwanese are reluctant to spend the money to care for their dogs when they themselves are feeling the economic pinch.
In one week of the previous month, she has adopted seventeen abandoned dogs.
Yen I-feng, director of the Taipei Municipal Institute for Animal Health, said city authorities are now strictly enforcing a law requiring dog owners to have their pets implanted with microchips. The microchips allow authorities to trace abandoned dogs back to their owners.
If dog owners are caught abandoning their dogs, they will be subjected to a fine of $455.
Chen keeps about 300 dogs in her 6,500-square-foot shelter, a gritty, tin-roofed building littered with plastic containers for food and drinking water.
Golden retrievers, Labrador retrievers, huskies, beagles and various other dogs blend together happily and fawn over Chen.
"The dogs got their rights and they have lives too. It's just that they cannot talk," she said as she petted some nearby dogs.
But Chen said with her pack of pooches growing by the day even she is worried about how she is going to feed so many mouths in these tough economic times.
She said the shelter only raised about $910 this month. "This is not even enough to feed my dogs," she said.
Well, my opinion is that these dogs should not be abandoned! These dogs have lives too, they are all living things. Living things should not be deprived of their rights to live and survive. If these dogs are abandoned and are homeless, they would die and starve to death, because there are nobody to come and adopt them, and care for them. For me, I am really grateful to Chen Wen-mei, because she is willing to care for these poor abandoned animals, despite the fact that the economy is plunging, and these animals will cause a fortune if she continue to keep adopting.
Everyone feels the pinch now, especially with the rising prices and plunging income and employment. Thus, I believe that when we purchase these cute animals from the pet shop, I think that we have the responsibility to care for them and provide them shelter, even in times when the economy is going down fast. We just have to remember that all small pets will soon grow up into big, large animals, and they still need our care and concern.
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Price: £129.99 upwards.
Price: Most outlets sell a PS3 with a game for under £300, but it pays to shop around.
Price: Retails at £179.99, many stores now offer a free game in addition to Wii Sports.
